Author's Note:
This story is a product of the author's imagination and purely fictional. Any likeness of other characters, stories, places, and others are unintentional.
This story is inspired by the historical movie Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral.
Enjoy!
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"Mahal kong Remedios,
nagbabalik ako sa'yo bilang marapat na diwa. Bilang lalaking pinili ang pinakamahahalagang bagay sa madilim na panahon.
Dangal, tungkulin, sakripisyo.
Hindi mawawalan ng halaga ang pagkamatay ko. Sapagkat namatay akong nagbibigay puri sa bayan..
At higit sa lahat, sa iyo.
Kailanman ay hindi ako magiging bayaning nasa ibabaw ng mga ulap, malayo at hindi maaabot, habang ako'y kinukupkop mo sa iyong puso.
At sa puso mo'y mananatili akong buhay at karapat-dapat sa iyong pagibig.
Sumasaiyo,
Gregorio."
I look at the time. 3 minutes before lunch time. Dahan-dahan kong nililigpit ang mga gamit ko para 'pag tumunog ang bell ay agad akong makaalis. Kanina pa ako nagugutom.
Tinignan ko ang paligid. Most of my classmates were crying after watching the movie Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral. Pinanood namin ang pelikula bilang basehan para sa aming proyekto na gumawa ng movie review.
As usual, hindi ako nakinig.
Saw the movie a lot of times already. The movie's nice. I just don't see myself rewatching it here in class.
"Ang sakit naman non! May panyo ka ba?" Umiling ako kay Shine at bored na bored na tumingin sa harap. The teacher's asking for comments about the movie.
Everyone's raising their hands to participate in class. Ayokong itaas ang kamay ko at wala naman akong masasabi. "Miss Flores? Any comment?" Nanlaki ang mata ko at inilibot ang paningin sa buong silid. When I scanned the whole room, ako lang pala ang hindi nakataas ang kamay kaya napabuntong-hininga ako. Punyeta.
"What do you think about the movie Miss Flores?" Our teacher smiled at me while my classmates were anticipating for my answer. Ready to laugh at me in case I say something funny. I bit my lower lip.
"The movie's nice." I gave a small fake smile after saying it. Tumaas ang kilay ng mga kaklase kong sipsip sa sinabi ko. Nakita ko pa silang ngumisi nang mapagtantong wala na akong masabi. Hindi na ako pinilit ni ma'am at nagtanong nalang sa iba.
She knew I wasn't in the mood to talk.
"Mr. Escobido? What can you say about Goyo and Remedios' love story?" Everyone turned their heads to Greg. I laughed internally after I heard the question. Yeah right, love.
" Of all people, bakit si Greg ang tinatanong ni ma'am? He's the most heartless I know! I don't even know kung may feelings ba 'yan. Basta ang alam ko, he just loves to play. 'Yon lang." I ignored Shine's remark and quietly waiting for Greg to answer the question.
"I think their love is wonderful yet painful ma'am. Wonderful because it carefully showed Goyo's affection to Remedios although she feels uncertain. Painful because the love felt right but the timing is wrong." Our teacher nodded and the class clapped because of admiration to Greg. Who would have thought he's listening and actually watching the movie?
I laughed. Napatingin silang lahat sa'kin nang marinig akong tumawa. I raised my brow at them. Pati ang guro namin ay napatingin sa akin. I stood up and looked at him.
"Excuse me, it's not wonderful and painful because first of all, love wasn't present. Why do I think so? As you can see in the movie, when Remedios got the letter Goyo wrote for her, her reaction is stoic. She didn't cry nor surprised. She felt empty. 17 years old lang si Remedios. She just felt a puppy love attraction to Goyo. On the other hand, Goyo might be serious but he's still the playboy of the town." I looked at everyone and gave a smirk.
"It was just lingering attraction, a little crush as what they say. Try to differentiate that from love." Shine gave me thumbs up sa sinabi ko. I smiled at her a little. I was doing my celebratory dance inside me nang biglang naagaw ang atensyon ko dahil biglang tumayo uli si Greg.
"That's not true. Remedios fell for Goyo. It was evident. You should try to put importance to small details. She fell in lo-" I cut him off before he could even say it.
"What do you know about love?" I caught him off-guard with my question. The air became awkward. Even our professor was surprised by my question. I saw him gulped before he met my eyes. Sinalubong ko ang mga titig niya kahit alam kong malulunod ako doon pag hindi ako iiwas.
"More than you. All you know is to shut people out. Even if all they wanted to do was help and love you. I think I know love more than you do so don't question my stand." I bit my lower lip to stop myself from talking back. Unti-unting namumuo ang luha sa mga mata ko pero pinipigilan ko 'yon. I will never cry in front of him. Never.
Tamang-tama naman at tumunog ang bell kaya agad kong kinuha ang bag ko at saka umalis. Fuck him.
Love is bullshit.
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