For The Love Of The Game (Book 1)

Chapter 11: School Tomorrow

I blinked my eyes a few times, as I was in fact quite a bit lost by just all that was even going on right at this very moment in time, in the very first place any ways, as I got my mind and I got my focus off of all of the rest of those other thoughts, as I then all of the sudden just nodded to my self, all at the exact same time as well, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, as it did not seem like my mother and Xavier could get enough of each other.
The entire time that they were at the table, they just seemed to laugh none stop, and just be having the time of their lives, as if they had been best friends their entire life. I was not even sure who this guy was yet, as he was completely knew to me, and it kind of made me feel quite a bit uncomfortable that he was getting so close to my mother as well.
I knew that there had been plenty of dudes that had simply just used my mother, for a quick hook up, just due to the fact that she was good looking, as I knew that it was just as much my mothers fault, as she was the one that did in fact always fall for it, none the less, all at the exact same time as well, though I still felt like I could not help but to feel bad for her, all at the exact same time as well.
Though, I was a bit upset with the fact that she had never told me about this man, as much as Xavier wanted to claim that it was his own fault, not hers, due to the fact that he had been the one that had become a no life drunk, when he had promised my father apparently that he was going to take care of me, before it was that my father had in fact been killed, never the less.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I did my best to try to calm my self down as best as I could either way, as I then all of the sudden shook my head a bit to my self, all at the exact same time too, and I then all of the sudden got my mind and my focus on the thoughts that had to do with the fact that I knew that I should just keep on eating, and I needed to quit asking my self so many questions right now.
I began to take a few bites in to the delicious meat loaf, as I knew that my mother for sure did not buy expensive meat what so ever, but for some reason or another, she always seemed to make the best food, as she told me that it was a trait that she got from her own mother, all at the exact same time as well, as she had wanted to try to help teach me how to cook as good as she did once, but I had in fact politely declined the offer.
As good as the food was, I really did not feel like I wanted to spend all of that time learning how to cook, especially since I knew that my focus needed to be on basketball, and also the fact that I also knew that I needed to get decent grades in school, if I wanted to be on a basketball team like that, especially at a kind of a preppy like school, all at the exact same time as well, as I knew that there was going to be a lot of white kids there, none the less.
I shivered at all of those thoughts, as it kind of scared me to think on school right now, especially since I really had not had a very good past experience in school, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden shook my head, and I got my mind and my focus off of the rest of those other thoughts, all at once, and I got my mind and my focus on the thoughts that had to do with the fact that my mother and Xavier were talking again.
Xavier had a big smile on his face, which kind of threw me off a bit, if I was not going to lie to my self, as my eyes kind of flustered a but, as he was looking at my mother right in to her eyes, as it almost seemed like the man was in love with my mother... No... That was impossible... He was surely just using her, right? That was after all what all dudes did to her, as I knew that for a fact once again, as that was a lot of the reason that my mother was always depressed, none the less.
How ever, the big smile that she had on her face seemed to say completely other wise, all at the exact same time as well, as she was staring at Xavier right in to his eyes right now, as she seemed to be the happiest that she had ever been in her life, all at the exact same time as well, none the less. I did my best to try to calm my self down, as I just got my eyes and my focus on the face of Xavier, all at the exact same time too, never the less.
Xavier after all was the one that was talking to my mother right now, after all, as I knew that I should be paying my attention to him right now, as I then all of the sudden did in fact begin to start to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to my mother in the very first place any ways, as well, as he continued to speak to her, just as he had been doing before.
"Damn Helena... I really have missed you... I'm sorry for not being there for you and Trevor... I've stopped my drinking problem... I promise that I will be there to help you now... I've even got a job that I'm making 15 bucks an hour at..." He said to her, as he had a big smile on his face, all at the exact same time as well, as to just what it was that he had even said to my mother in the very first place any ways.
It felt like he might have messed up on just what it was that he had said to her how ever, as that was one thing that my mother did not care for, which was of fact money, as she really did not want to go after a guy, simply due to the fact that he had money. Besides... 15$ an hour really was not that much in the very first place any ways, all at the exact same time as well, so I was not all too sure as to just what it was that he was doing to try to impress her.
I tilted my head at the man, as I saw that he just seemed to have a big smile on his face, as it did not seem like he was trying to impress my mother at all what so ever, as it seemed like he was more just seeming to be proud of him self, as to just what it was that he had even said to her, all at the exact same time as well, which did in fact confuse me quite a bit, once again.
I did not know the man at all, but it was clear that he had a drinking problem, just based off of the fact that he had kind of admitted to it, with no such sort of embarrassed look on his face what so ever, as to just what it was that he had even said to her at all, with me in the room with him, all at the exact same time as well, as he had come to meet me at the court, to talk to be, but this seemed to be more about my mother than it did me now.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I did my best to try to calm my self down, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to turn my head over to my mother, all at once, as I expected her to have a bit of a frown on her face, or for her to have rolled her eyes at the man, but that seemed to be just the opposite of that, as I saw that she had the same big smile that she had before, as she then all of the sudden went in and gave the man a hug, all at once.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I did my best to try to calm my self down as best as I could, as I then all of the sudden saw my mother nod back to the man, all at once, to let him know that she was in fact finally ready to go on ahead and start to speak back to him, all at the exact same time too, as she now all of the sudden seemed to have a little bit more of a serious look on her face right at this very moment in time too, as I blinked my eyes a few times, and I then all of the sudden just tilted my head at her.
It seemed like Xavier was just as confused as I was, none the less, though, he seemed to know better, as he then all of the sudden did in fact go on ahead and start to nod to her as a bit of a response, to let her know that he was in fact paying attention as to just what it was that she even was about to say to him in the very first place any ways, none the less.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I did my best to try to stay calm my self, all at once, as I too did in fact begin to start to listen as to just what it was that she even had to say to him as a bit of a response in the very first place any ways, as soon as it was that she did in fact begin to finally begin to start to speak to him, none the less.
"I can't even begin to tell you how much I am proud of Xavier... You are doing amazing... I am just glad that you answered my call... My son really needs you right now..." She said back to Xavier, as I was a little bit confused by just what it was that she had even said back to him in the very first place any ways, none the less, as I was fairly certain that I had not needed this man before now, as I did not have a clue as to just who it was that this man was in the very first place any ways.
I felt like I had been doing just fine on my own if I was going to be for real with my self, as I had managed my self just fine, practicing by my self, and doing every thing on my own, as I felt like there was no need to get some drunk alcoholic in my life to help me what so ever, as I felt like I might be being a little bit too harsh on the guy right now, but I did not care all too much, as I just squinted my eyes at the guy, all at the exact same time too.
If this guy was supposed to be with me in the early stages of my life, none the less, than I was not all too sure as to just how it was that it now all of the sudden seemed like that my mother was now all of the sudden perfectly fine with the fact that he had been gone for who knows how long, and he had not helped me a single bit during that time, as it now all of the sudden seemed to be that they were playing a little bit of some husband and wife all of the sudden, never the less.
I squinted my eyes over at the man, who it seemed like he noticed me do as such a thing from the corner of his eyes, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden did in fact start to see him turn his head over to me, and he looked at me right in to my eyes with quite a bit of a confused look on his face, all at the exact same time as well, as to just why it was that I was so upset, and just why it was that I was all of the sudden so hostile all at once, once again.
My mother seemed to turn her head over to me, all at the exact same time as well, as soon as it seemed like she had now all of the sudden seen Xavier do as such a thing, as I saw that my mother was now looking at me all of the sudden, as I then all of the sudden saw that the look that she had on her face, now all of the sudden seemed to turn in to quite a bit of a worried look all of the sudden, all at the exact same time as well, none the less.
Of course, she could tell how angry, and how upset I was right now, as she knew how bad it was that I was in fact to get when ever it was that I got that way in the very first place any ways, as that was the reason that I was taking therapy right now, though it seemed like all of those things that the therapist had tried to teach me, were now all of the sudden seeming to go away from my mind, all at the exact same time as well, as it seemed like I did not care about any of that at all.
My mom blinked her eyes at me, all at once, as I then all of the sudden saw her shake her head over towards me, all at the exact same time as well, as I knew what it was that she was getting at, never the less, which I felt quite a bit guilty for, if I was not going to lie to my self either. She had in fact had a decent boy friend one time, who had told her that he was leaving her, cuz he could handle my 'shit' any more, and I felt like I needed to calm my self down, as I did not even know this guy just yet, all at the exact same time too.
Either way, I still felt like I could not help but to be a little bit upset by it either way, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden got my eyes, and my focus back on to Xavier, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden did in fact go on ahead and start to nod over to him, all at once, to let him know that I was in fact about to go on ahead and begin to start to speak to him, all at the exact same time as well.
He did not seem to be all too bothered by me at all, what so ever, as he simply just seemed to go on ahead and nod back to me, all at the exact same time too, as I did my best to calm my self down once again, as I felt like I was thinking too fast right now, as I felt like the guy was not a bad guy what so ever, as I then all of the sudden got my mind and my focus off of all of those thoughts once again.
Now that it was that I knew that he was in fact paying attention to my how ever, all at the exact same time as well, I then all of the sudden did in fact begin to start to go on ahead and begin to speak to him, all at the exact same time too, as I knew that he was in fact safe, and he was in fact beginning to start to listen as to just what it was that I even had to say to him in the very first place any ways, none the less.
"Look dude... I don't have a single clue who you are yet... But you are making me feel very uncomfortable right now if I am not going to lie to my self..." I said to the man, as there was a lot of other things that I wanted to say to him right now, but luckily I managed to keep my self clan and cool, all at the exact same time as well, as that felt like the way better way of saying the things that I had in fact wanted to say in the very first place any ways, never the less, once again.
The man looked at me a little bit surprised, as he seemed to have quite a bit of a guilty look on his face, all at the exact same time too, as to just what it was that I had even said to him, all at the exact same time as well, as it was clear that he felt a bit bad that he had just come in to my place and began to hit on my mother, when he had said that this had all been about me, though they had not said a single word to me just yet.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I squinted my eyes at the man for quite a bit of some time, as I felt a little bit better that I was now getting him on edge, none the less, as I kind of hoped that it would get his focus back on to the reality, and back on to just what it was that he had said to me, and just what it was that he had even promised me in the very first place any ways, all at the exact same time as well, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh of relief to my self, all at the exact same time too, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of all of those thoughts once again.
I stared at him for just a little bit longer, as the guy then began to start to move around in the chair for just a little bit longer, all at the exact same time as well, as it was in fact quite a bit clear that what it was that I had in fact just said to him, all at the exact same time too, had in fact made him feel quite a bit uncomfortable, as it seemed to have in fact also kind of questioned him self in to just what it was that he was even doing right now, none the less.
I really was not all too sure as to just what else it was that I should really be doing right now, so I just seemed to simply squint my eyes at him, just as I had been doing long before now, all at the exact same time as well, as in the end, he then did in fact seem to get his attention back on to the presence, and back on to reality, as he now saw that both I and my mother were in fact staring at him right at this very moment in time too.
He seemed to now just be looking right back at me, right in to my eyes, all at the exact same time as well, as in the end, he then all of the sudden did in fact begin to start to go on ahead and begin to nod to me, to let me know that he was in fact about to go on ahead and start to speak to me, none the less, as I was quite a bit lost as to just what it was that was even going on right at this very moment in time any ways, that it almost seemed like I had missed as to just what it was that he had even done as well.
I just seemed to stare at him with a little bit of a blank look on my face for a little bit longer, as in the end, it then all of the sudden did in fact begin to start to come back to me, all at once, once again, as I then all of the sudden did in fact go right on ahead and nod back to the man, to let him know that I was in fact paying attention as to just what it was that he was even about to say to me in the very first place any ways, all at the exact same time as well.
After it was that he had in fact seen me do as such a thing in a little bit of a response back to him, he then all of the sudden did in fact go right on ahead and thankfully begin to start to speak to me, all at the exact same time as well, as I did in fact begin to start to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to me, in the very first place any ways, never the less.
"Well... I'm sorry about that... I was just really close to your mother... Before... Well... You know... But..." He began to say to me, as he then seemed to start to stutter on his words, all at the exact same time as well, as I then all of the sudden began to start to see him begin to lower his head a bit low to the ground all at the exact same time too, as I could tell that he for some reason once again seemed to have a little bit of a look of guilt on his face for some odd reason or another, which I still was not all too sure as to just why that was even the case in the very first place any ways, once again. I did not know the man at all, so I was not all too sure as to just what it was that he should be guilty for right now. Perhaps it was the fact that he was embarrassed as to the fact that he had not been there for my mother, though my mother once again did not seem to have her eyes on him at all, so that did not make all too much sense at all, as I looked over at my mother, to see that she was looking at me right in to my eyes right at this very moment in time as well. I blinked my eyes a few times, as I did my best to try to calm my self down once again, as I then all of the sudden did in begin to start to hear Xavier begin to start to speak to me, once again, as I then all of the sudden turned my head over to him, just as I had done before, as I then once again began to start to listen as to just what it was that he even had to say to me in the very first place any ways, as well. "I'll be back next weekend... I'm sorry... I have plans that I forgot about... I'll be back for you kid... Just keep on working on your game..."
I looked at the dude a little bit surprised, all at the exact same time as well, as to just what it was that he had even just said to me once again, as I blinked my eyes a few times, and I then all of the sudden tilted my head over towards him, all at the exact same time too, as it was clear that he had in fact quite a bit of a guilty look on his face right at this very moment in time too, as to just what it was that he had even just said to me.
It was as if he was lying, which of course made sense that he would be, as I really doubted that he had any where to go, as based off of the fact that he had said that he was a drunk, and that he had been proud of making 15$ an hour, I had to guess that he did not have any friends that he had those so called plans to go and attend to, all at the exact same time as well.
I let out a bit of a soft sigh to my self, all at the exact same time too how ever, as I felt like it might have been a lot to do with it being my fault, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like I might have been stressing him out quite a bit, as it was clear that the guy had a lot of stress and anxiety problems that he needed to have dealt with, as I felt like the guy might need a therapist, such as the one that I had right now, all at the exact same time as well.
Though, I was not dumb enough to say it to the dudes face, as I simply just thought it through my head, as I then all of the sudden began to continue to stare at the man, all at once, as he then all of the sudden began to start to lift him self up from off of the chair that he was sitting on, right beside my mother at the table, all at the exact same time as well, as I breathed in quite a bit to my self, all at the exact same time too, as I got my mind and my focus off of all of those thoughts.
I blinked my eyes a few times, as I just continued to stare at the man for a little bit longer, as he then all of the sudden grabbed his bowl that the meat loaf had even been on in the very first place any ways, as he then began to start to get away from the table, all at once, as he then all of the sudden did in fact nod back to my mother, all at the exact same time as well, almost as if it was him trying to say good bye to her, but with out the fact that he had said any words to her what so ever, all at the exact same time as well.
I felt quite a bit bad for my mother, all at the exact same time as well, as I could tell that she was just at about as much of a loss for words as I was right now, as she just seemed to have a bit of a shocked look on her face right at this very moment in time too, as she then just blinked her eyes a few times, all at once, as I watched Xavier just walk out of the dining room, and he then all of the sudden began to just put the bowl that he had ate off of in to the sink.
It did not even seem like he was going to wash it off what so ever, at all, as he then quickly just began to start to head over to the front door of our place, all at the exact same time as well, as once again, he did not say a single word in a response back to either of us, as just like that, he was out of the door in just a blur, almost as if he had not even been here in the very first place any ways, and as if this was just a dream.
I blinked my eyes a few times my self, as I wondered if that was in fact the case for just a few moments in time, as it felt like today had been a weird enough day as it was so far, that it would not surprise me what so ever, all at the exact same time too, as I just shook my head, all at once, as I got my mind, and my focus off of that man, as I then all of the sudden turned my head over to my mother, all at once.
I could tell that she had quite a bit of a look of shock on her own face right now, all at the exact same time too, as to just how fast it had seemed like he had came and went out of our place, as it almost seemed like he was like the rest of her boyfriends, all at the exact same time as well, which I felt quite a bit bad for the both of them for even thinking that way, none the less. I felt bad for Xavier, as I still was yet to know the guy at all, but I also felt bad for my mother, as I knew that she was just blind to all of it.
I let out quite a bit of a heavy sigh to my self, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden saw that my mother now all of the sudden had lifted her head up, and she had her eyes locked right on with mine right now, all at the exact same time too, as it was clear that she seemed to almost feel like a bit of an idiot for calling the man in the very first place any ways, once again, which I felt quite a bit bad for her for it, all at the exact same time as well, none the less.
I was not all too sure as to just what it was that I should do for just a few moments, as I was about to shake my head over to her, but I felt like I did not want to make my mother feel any sort of worse what so ever, as I just went on ahead instead, and just nodded to her, all at the exact same time a swell, to let her know that I was in fact about ready to go on ahead and begin to start to speak to her, all at the exact same time too.
My mother seemed to just be staring at me for quite a bit of some time, with quite a bit of a blank look on her face, until in the end, she then all of the sudden did in fact go on ahead and begin to start to nod back to me, thankfully, finally, all at the exact same time as well, as I let out a bit of a soft sigh of relief to my self, all at the exact same time too, as soon as it was that I had seen her do as such a thing, as I was in fact glad to know that she was in fact paying attention to me right now, never the less.
I continued to stare at my mother for just a little bit longer, until in the end, I did in fact begin to start to go on ahead and begin to speak to her, all at the exact same time as well, now that it was that I did in fact know that she was in fact beginning to start to listen as to just what it was that I was even about to say to her in the very first place any ways, none the less.
"Well... Um... That was strange... You don't think he's actually going to come back to help me... Do you?" I said to her, as I looked at her right in to her eyes, as I wanted her to be serious with me right now, all at the exact same time as well, as I really did not want her to get her hopes up, only to be rudely disappointed when it was that he did not in fact show up to come and help me next weekend, all at the exact same time as well, to go on ahead and help me with basketball.
I was not all too sure as to just what it was that he could help me with in the very first place any ways, if I was going to be for real with my self, none the less, as I breathed in quite a bit heavily to my self, once again, as I then all of the sudden shook my head, as I did my best to try to shake off all of those thoughts from my head, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like I just needed to keep my hopes up.
I knew that people were in fact right with what it was that they had told me, as I knew that at some point in my life, and hopefully very soon at that, I would be able to grow, and it would mean that I would start to hit a new level in my game, all at the exact same time as well, never the less. I breathed in quite a bit softly to my self, all at the exact same time as well, as I felt like there might be some stuff that he might be able to help me out with, that I was not all too sure about.
Apparently he had been a 5 star athlete coming out of high school, so there was no harm in the fact that going to go ahead and help me with some stuff, as I knew that shooting was one thing, and he might be able to show me a good shooting motion for kids that our my height, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden this time did in fact begin to star to shake my head a bit to my self, all at the exact same time as well, as I got my mind, and I got my focus off of the rest of those thoughts, once again.
I breathed in quite a bit to my self, all at once, as I then all of the sudden began to start to think on the fact that my mother was now staring right back at me, after the few moments that she had been staring at the ground, with quite a bit of a guilty look on her own face, almost as if she felt a little bit bad for the fact that she felt like she might have got my hopes up a little bit too much, all at the exact same time as well, never the less.
I really had never had hopes in the very first place any ways, if I was not going to lie to my self either, as I felt like I had simply just been thinking on the fact that I was a bit lost as to just who it was that this man even thought that he was in the very first place any ways, all at the exact same time as well, never the less, once again. It really did not matter all too much to me at all, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden did in fact go on ahead and start to lift my head up to my mother all at once, all at the exact same time as well.
My mother looked at me with quite a bit of a blank look on her face for quite a bit of some time, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden seemed to see that she now noticed that I was now looking at her, as I now saw the emotion seem to come back on her face, as it seemed like she had been thinking to her self before hand, all at the exact same time too. Now that it was that she saw that I was looking at her, none the less, she then did in fact go on ahead and nod to me, to let me know that she was in fact about to go on ahead and begin to start to speak to me, all at the exact same time as well, too.
I just seemed to stare at her with quite a bit of a blank look on my own face for a little bit of time my self, until finally in the end, I did in fact blink my eyes a few times, to wake my self up a bit, as I then all of the sudden did in fact nod back to her, to let her know that I was in fact paying attention to her right now, never the less.
Now that my mother had in fact seen me do as such a thing, she then did in fact go on ahead and begin to start to speak up to me, all at the exact same time as well, as I then did in fact begin to start to listen as to just what it was that she even had to say to me, in the very first place any ways.
"I hope so too son... But for now... Your focus needs to be on what's up next..." She said to me, as I then all of the sudden saw that my mother then all of the sudden had her eyes squinted over towards me, all at the exact same time too, for some odd reason or another, which I did not have a single clue as to just why that was in fact the case in the very first place any ways, as I simply then all of the sudden just tilted my head over towards my mother, all at the exact same time too, as I then all of the sudden began to start to see that my mother then did in fact smile over towards me, once again. What was she talking about by what's next? Was she saying that she expected there to be a next step in my game. I was not all too sure, as I simply had my head tilted over towards her, as she then began to start to continue to speak to me, once again, as I did in fact begin to start to continue to listen as to just what it was that she even had to say, all at the exact same time as well, never the less. "Don't forget, that you've got your first day at school tomorrow!"