"Meant for me"

Tortured Soul

I was lost i couldn't get him out of my mind' everywhere i looked i could see or feel him, thinking about that night we had spent together, my birthday will forever be a constant reminder , year after year, his manliness all over me ' those lips that kissed mine' I could still here him whisper ' Kiss me' I am in love with him & no one in this world would ever change that not even myself' I needed him and him only" I'm not at all okay my heart ached every second' I felt like....dieing' he promised me forever , forever i thought wasn't long enough....today would hopefully be the day i could see him i wanted more ' i think I'm too much for him, maybe just maybe i scared my one true love away? I couldn't think straight, how could this man just ...just.. What the hell was that? I began to feel sick to my stomach a sharp pain came over me all of a sudden i fell to my knee's feeling the coolness of my chamber floor with one hand holding on to my bed post while the other hand held the pain of my stomach i hurt terribly it felt like it was ripping my inside's out, i wanted to scream from the pain but i didn't want to alarm anyone especially my mother....please stop i prayed with tear's in my eyes, i pulled myself onto my bed thinking if i laid down i might fall asleep and the pain would go away, i struggled cathing my grip onto my bed post' slowly i made my way to the side of my bed , i thought in such relief i started to feel at ease gasping a little from the stabbing pain i curled myself into a ball cradling back & forth ...finally after a few minutes the pain started slowly going away ' short breath's as much as i wanted to call for my mother i needed her but right now i wasn't sure what was going on " i was confused i never felt such pain before ... I felt my eyes getting heaving most likely from the rocking ....slowly i dozed off....