They Should Call You Sugar, Your So Sweet (Smutz)

In the morning

Deena thinks she's a sweet talker, and that I've probably forgot what she did to me, yet the truth is that I haven't. It is like getting stung by a bee, the bee apologising, inviting you to dinner, apologising again and then paying the bill. Helping you to put your coat on and escorting you home at the end of the night before mumbling yet another 'I'm really sorry.'

She's still asleep next to me, somehow clutching one of the pillows I'd brought with me from my mum's house. I can't help but feel bitter. Unable to even talk about my parents because what Deena did. All the ways she showed appreciation and gestured that I was "moving up in the world". Leaving her behind in the "suck" (Deena's words, not mine) because my parents knew about us and deemed seeing a "bull-dyke" around their daughter as a bad thing.

Looking at the way that her frizzy, unkempt dark hair and how it hit the pillow only made it feel worse that we act like it didn't happen. Her stomach rises and falls slowly, her mouth opens slightly as she gently snores against the sheets.

I hate feeling attraction towards her. Um, sexual attraction towards Deena because I feel like after all this time, I shouldn't want to see and be with her like that. Yet I can't stop getting ideas every time that I see her. Like it's second nature, or the only way that I can physically be with her...or something.

It's a distraction. Deena is so god damn distracting to me.

"Morning sex?" her voice was raspy in a sexy way. And I could feel myself blushing at her request.

She must've woken up and clocked onto how tight my gaze was on her mouth. Observing the way her lips curve and conform into her beauty. Those brown eyes so inquisitive and curious that I end up closing my own eyes and leaning into her kiss.

I thought she'd have guilt on her tongue. Yet the second that we start to lose ourselves into each other, one of my hands has crawled up to the space between the top of her ribs and her collarbone. The other knotting into her thick hair. I could taste undertones of fear and worry through her excitement. Telling me that it's not a choice and that Deena has got to give me everything that she has for this to work.

"Have we ever even had it at this time before?" I ask as she makes her way on top of me. it feels hot and slightly rushed. Her hands quickly whipping to either-sides of my body as I part my legs for Deena, giving her permission to place herself in between them.

"No, but I remember you telling me that you'd dreamt about it before." She catches my hands in hers. Pressing kisses to my knuckles. The action was so sweet, such a contrast to the compromising situation we were in and all the hormones that looking at her was making flood through my body. "And I love you so much that I want to give you everything you've ever dreamt of."

I grin. Ignoring how heavy the thump in my heart was going as she kissed over my knuckles on the other hand. Deena's smile can never get old and I'm pretty sure that I want to give her everything she's ever dreamt of too.

"I love you." I find myself blushing into her neck. Pulling her closer into me before pressing a few kisses there. Using my tongue and teeth to gently bite down on her earlobe before soothing the area afterwards. One of the one thing that I know really gets to her. "You know what happens next in my fantasy right?"

Deena immediately nods. Leaving my embrace to take of my pyjama pants before her hands meet my thighs and her lips meet my neck.

My breathing hitches when our eyes meet. She's the object of my desire and all I can see when I investigate her abys of brown-goldy coppers. Made darker from her arousal. They said that dark chocolate was an aphrodisiac, not my fiancé, yet now I'm feeling the scientists or whatever were wrong.

I search for my grip on Deena's shoulders as she palms my thigh with one of her hands. Putting her notes from the last time she was on top of me into play with the way that her other was on my face. Our eye contact never breaking whilst she extends her thumb to meet my bottom lip. Pulling it down slightly before bringing it into my mouth, which I then bite playfully causing a small glimmer to coat Deena's eyes.

"Oh." She says it like she didn't think that I'd do that. Which only makes it hotter because with the way she was on top of me, I could see her crumble at the actions I was taking. Her already dark cheeks becoming flushed when I swirl my tongue around it before she releases her thumb from my mouth. "My god Sam."

"Don't we need to keep it down?" I ask Deena, who was far too busy with her heavy breathing and mission to take my top off. I watched her throw it off of the bed and onto the floor. Her mouth agape as she breathed me in. Giving me no response and instead cupping one of my breasts as her lips had gone to the other.

I was more thinking for her own sake then my own. To save her the embarrassment and so that we don't end up breaking in the news of our engagement to josh in this way.

"Hm?" she mutters against my skin. Coming back over me in search of my eye contact.

"Do we...well, more you need to keep quiet?" I ask. Keeping my voice low espeacilly for her.

But I could read on her face that she wasn't going to let a comment like that pass easily. It was like watching someone receive news that they couldn't bare to hear. And she bites back.

"Says the girl who likes to talk me through my orgasms."

And Deena says it so quickly, almost as a mumble, before kicking her pyjama pants off. Placing her area of vulnerability over mine so that it was hard to process who exactly needs to be holding their most intimate sounds in.

I'd never imagined that she'd keep her composure and that I'd be the one melting in this position. Always assuming that I'd be the one flipping her over, getting ahead of her and setting a pattern for us both to follow into. Hips moving tightly over each other's.

Deena stays flat against me for a while, as if she was trying to figure out the best way for us to do this. And I hadn't been topped by Deena in so long that I felt that I'd break into two the second that we find our flow again.

"What are you doing?" I softly ask. Trying not to sound too judgemental or rude in this light.

"I can't see what I'm doing, you know, to get it in the right position to be good for you." She shifts again and I feel my hands going to the warm, delicate skin on her back. Gripping there slightly once I felt her slick heat suddenly find its match. Beating in satisfaction at how it felt like lightning bolts and electricity when Deena accidently shifted forwards a touch. Causing them to bump together slightly before she hovers over me. Checking my face for any signs of awkwardness or discomfort.

"Is that okay? Do you need a pillow behind the curve of your back to sorta, help support everything or?" She starts rambling and I can't help but wonder how this is the same girl who I met a good three or so years ago. I never would've thought she'd ever fight for my comfort like this.

"I- is everything okay Sam?" she asks again, and I find myself laughing. Silly grinning in front of the brunette.

"A pillow would be good," I feel my hands go to her sweet cheeks. "I can put my hands on your hips and help guide you."

Dee grabs a pillow before climbing back into our bed. Helping me to put it in the right position before she starts to climb on top of me and rest herself in between my legs again.

"Should I just go down on you instead?"