I've read, watched, and even listened to many things that have to do with love. They all have this thing about either things going bad or good and it all ends with just that. I used to always think that's what love was all about. You find someone you love, then maybe break up or stay together, but that really isn't the case, 14 year old me would be so excited to find out everything else that's missing but me now would definitely love to go back to when I was inexperienced and clueless. I'm not saying that because I regret the many realistic things I've seen or even experienced myself, but because I wanna feel that same feeling I had towards love when I was 14. No fear of anything but also no desire.
As you can already tell I'm treating this like it's a diary entry (which is exactly what it is). I used to go on this website/app to write about falling in love with idols and telling stories of unrealistic fantasies, but now that I've experienced realistic love myself, all those fantasies I had that was applied in those stories I wrote, all just went down the drain. I know I'm coming off numb and heartless, but trust me I'm really not. I don't wanna be one of those people who've experienced all the things the come with loving someone or something but still end up having others romanticize it (though I know that it's inevitable for others.). I don't want you guys to think that love is a bad thing either, though I do want you to know that love does come with it's negatives.
But what exactly lead me to write this diary entry of mine? To be fully honest... It's cause I realized I should. I'll tell you more about it later on, but first I wanna let you guys know that even if I'm writing or talking about all this stuff about love and how displeasing it can be at times I'm actually in a healthy relationship right now. I'll be sharing experiences and stuff but I won't be going into full on detail... I'll just be talking about what I've been learning through out.
Lastly, I wanna mention that everything in these entries are my own personal experiences so I don't want you guys to say that I'm a "know it all". If there are other individuals out there that can relate to those experiences that I've gone through THAT'S GREAT, or if there are people who agree with some of my opinions. But overall, I just want to share these entries with the world. When I thought about writing these entries on Wattpad for the first time I felt stupid...Cause you know... WHY WATTPAD!? So I almost wrote it for a college essay. But honestly this is a lot better, cause I don't have to feel pressured about grammatical errors LOL and I can use slang. I feel like I'll be able to express my true emotions a lot more and I'll be able to truly be myself while writing.
I'll end this entry here. Wish me luck !! <3
The first petal has fallen.
