Sweet Thang [COMPLETE]

Judge Me

Suzette

"Hey, Mama. I haven't seen you in a few days," Shayne greeted me with a tight hug as I walked through the door. I laughed. "Is you mindin' my business?" I asked sarcastically as I turned to lock the door behind me. I turned back around to see Shayne staring me up and down. "Mamaaaa... where you get these threads girl?"

I shook my head while taking a deep sigh. "My man took me shoppin', thank you very much."

"Again? Oh, that thang must go crazy, you got that man whipped." She started cracking up as I rolled my eyes while dropping my car keys into my new little red clutch.

"What the hell do you have on?" I looked up to see Cortez standing in the doorway of his office taking in the sight of this short ass tight ass fuzzy off the shoulder dress that I was rocking with a pair of red Himaya Louboutin stilettos— which were no doubt my new faves. I pushed my hair behind my shoulder.

"What's wrapped around this body of mine is no longer a concern of yours." I shrugged and Shayne gasped.

"Can I talk to you for a minute, Suzette?" Cortez asked and my daughter grabbed my hand. I raised her hand to my lips and kissed it. "Go wait for me in my room. I got this baby," I assured her as I walked into Cortez's office hanging onto the door handle and when he walked further inside I shut the door for him. "I noticed you haven't been home all week. You gone send yourself right to hell shacking up with that heathen." I rolled my eyes and let out a genuine laugh.

"You always did have a jealous bone. But you know what? Go head and judge me. Judge me all you want. You still lost the best thing that ever happened to your sorry ass and unfortunately for you, you'll never get it back." I snickered. "You gone have to wake up every day for the rest of your life fightin' demons, and it's nobody's fault but yours. We had two not so bad years. But for twenty-six I did all the work to make it work and what did you do?" Cortez said nothing.

"Exactly. So don't worry about where I been layin' my head or who I'm layin' it next to."

"We're still married, Suzette."

I sucked my teeth. "Barely," I said while shrugging nonchalantly. Cortez grabbed me by the arm and I snatched away swinging and ready to fight. I was tired of getting my ass beat, and I damn sure was not about to let this sorry excuse for a man who was finally about to walk out of my life for good punk me out one more time. I'd be lying to say I didn't have a whole lot of pent up animosity for Cortez either. If it came to it I'd be more than happy to show Cortez that I was not the little girl he thought he was dealing with anymore. It had been about twenty-three years since I even tried to fight his ass back no matter how many times I thought about it.

Oh but today, I got time. And if all else failed— I had the cutest little gun I was toting in this clutch courtesy of Sammy of course. "I dare you to put yo hands on me, I'll dust this muthafuckin office witcho ass," I snarled with my fists clenched ready to hit him before he hit me and Cortez put his hands up as if in surrender. "I just want you back Susie!"

I chuckled and rolled my eyes to the ceiling. "You want me back?"

"Yes! I want you back!"

"Why?!" I slapped my thigh out of anger. "So you can keep chasing after every young wild thing that struts through the door of your church? To come home to a cold home cooked meal and a wife you won't touch after you've 'given good counsel' into the wee hours of the night? Tip toein' out the bed twelve and two in the mornin', knowin' you leavin' me in this house to wake up in the dark and find that you ain't here?! Or maybe so you can have yo fixture back at yo side onnat damn pulpit? Well let me put it in words you might understand Doc— I'm tired! I am tired of praying that one day you might actually climb on top of me without having to put yo hands on me first and I am tired of being nothing but the pretty thing on your arm at that church! Show me off in front them people just to come home, throw me on the ground and step over me like dirty laundry— I'm tired, Doc! Or maybe you want me back so I can do the work you know you can't do? Is that what it is? Cuz Doc, I'm tired of that too. Whether you like it or not, oh we going our separate ways. And you gone have to learn how to Daddy these kids all on your own. I ain't no pack mule— I ain't finna keep puttin' my head down just to carry yo load. Not never no more. Cuz I see you now! I really do. I thought I always did but that wasn't true. I saw the lies you told but you told them so sweet that I believed them. Like... 'you so pretty I don't care if you're worth not even one red gem.' Just to shatter every mirror in this house a week later. And kiss my head and say that's okay cuz I only need to see my beauty in yo words on paper... but guess what? I've seen me sparkle. Pretty and bright— ruby and white. I know now my value ain't tied to me being at your side. And Doc, I'm tired of actin' like it is."