Always Check the Shower

Shower

MATURE READERS ONLY.
CW: body dysmorphia, knife play
Character mentioned by name created by TikTok creator: @ishness.
All rights reserved.

Normally I'm only in the shower long enough to properly wash and rinse my body but this time, I'd managed a longer one, leaving the lights off so I could enjoy the heat. The dark lends me temporary reprieve; dysmorphia is a bitch.

Once my skin is raw and I'm hot to the touch, I climb out, trying to ignore the ever present feeling that someone is around - maybe it's intuition, maybe it's anxiety. Either way, it makes my skin ripple with goosebumps; steps quick as I hurry to my bedroom.

When I return to the bathroom, I flip the lights on and move to stand in front of the vanity. The mirror is still steamed over and I reach up to swipe at it but my hand never actually touches the glass. In a blur, the shower curtain flings open with the metallic sound of shower rings on the rod and a hand clamps over my mouth before I can scream. Any following sounds are muffled and both hands move to claw at the arm across my chest, trying to move away as they yank me back against them.

"You know, you should really learn to check behind the shower curtain."

Normally a warning like that would make your blood run cold and while it did send a cold chill through me, I knew that voice, slightly comforted by the realization that my intruder was none other than DZ. It was only a slight comfort since I had a gut feeling what had brought him there but comfort nonetheless. My breathing slowly started to lax, only panting a bit to catch my breath as I squinted at the mirror, trying to make out his reflection. While his hand slowly moved away from my mouth, his arm didn't, keeping me held tightly to his chest.

"How long have you been here?" My voice was hoarse, unused that morning til just then.

"Long enough." He answered, the ever present grit in his voice made anything he said sound sexy. His fingers brushed my hair away from my shoulder slowly, the movement making me shudder just as he lowered his lips to my skin. Small kisses lined my shoulder up to my neck and I found myself tilting my head to give him space.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered despite the fact that we were alone, used to late night visits instead of early morning.

"You need me."

Okay... he wasn't wrong but still, I hadn't called out to him recently. Hell, I hadn't even sought out Zyggy in a while even though he probably could've helped out many a night.

"What makes you think that?"

I can feel his lips curl into a smirk at my question, pressing another kiss just beneath my ear. His breath is hot on my skin but he doesn't move to kiss me again; instead, I feel his lips on my ear as he speaks up.

"You said you needed help understanding why you're stuck in this body."

My heart sinks a bit and I swallow hard, fighting the mix of embarrassment and emotion that hits me. My eyes grow a bit blurry with tears and I blink hard, forcing my gaze to the mirror that's starting to slowly clear up.

"I didn't say any of that out loud."

In the mirror, I can finally see his features and we seem to lock gazes as he gives a sad smile. "Your shadow is nearly screaming, calling out to me. I can't ignore her." The fingers on his free hand slowly start to creep under the hem of my tank top, running over my belly.

"Do it. Ignore her. I do."

That seems to piss him off and the hand that had was across my body before moved to grip my neck. His grip started at the base of my throat and moved upward, forcing me to tilt my head up and back. "I can't ignore you. Especially when you won't let yourself feel good because you think you're unworthy. You deserve to enjoy yourself," he insisted, the hand that had been on my waist starting to coast over my harsh curves. His touch there was gentle while the opposite hand toyed with cutting off my breath.

"Maybe once I lose—" I started but his hand tightened on my throat, turning my words into a lost squeak.

"This body," he growled. "Just the way it is right now. You don't have to change in order to feel something, pet. Especially something as simple as this," he insisted, fingers sliding back down to dip into my underwear. My hips tilt back away from his touch, sensitive after not paying any attention to myself for so long. A low growl rumbled in my ear and he pressed his hips against me, forcing me back into his hand. "Feel it. Process it. I know you need it," he murmured, his fingers making a skilled circle around my clit before dipping into my heat for more.

My head was spinning, partly from the way he gripped at my throat but mostly the way he worked me over. It was like he wrote the book on how to please me, each touch shoving me closer and closer to release. At the last moment though, both of his hands moved away from me. The rush of being able to breathe again made me gasp, looking over my shoulder at him with a bit of confusion. His hands were busy with his belt, then the button of his jeans, and before I could even mumble my approval, the fabric was pooled at his feet and he pushed forward to bend me over the vanity.

"You okay?" He breathed, free hand digging into his pocket. I started to nod my head but caught myself knowing he'd need a verbal confirmation.

"Y-yes."

"Good." The word was followed with the familiar sound of his knife flipping open. I couldn't help but smile but any words I thought about saying were cut off by the sensation of cold against my hip. With a low reminder not to move, my panties were cut away, fully exposing my lower half to him. I also thought about trying to hide myself but there was no time, his movements too quick.

"Good. Now take it. Don't think. Just... take it."

With those last two words, I was filled, his length buried to the hilt inside my walls and I let out a soft moan, grabbing the edge of the vanity. His thrusts were slow but deep, shoving me against the counter with each one. I started to adjust, able to see my stomach pressed against vanity as I looked in the mirror but a sharp pain on my lower back made me stop. I raised my gaze to DZ's face and he smirked, shaking his head in return. It was confusing but his hand dipped to nudge at my clit, bringing me to a place of submission yet again as I moaned.

The pain happened a few more times throughout but it was always followed with a distraction; a kiss, a stroke, a particularly hard thrust. It wasn't until I caught the reflection of the knife in the mirror as his free hand forced me to straighten my back that I realized what he'd been doing. Yet again, I couldn't bring myself to ask why though, the thrusts sending me into a slight spiral after riding the edge of release for what seemed like an eternity. My walls gripped at him as I let go, finally allowing myself to ride that glorious ebb and flow of release around his length. A passing thought hated the way my face contorted with my orgasm and again, I was met with the sharp pain. It only made the orgasm harder though, even coaxing a moan out of DZ.

I smirked and pressed back against him with a pant, his release following not long after my own. When we separated, I sighed, slowly straightening up as DZ worked his jeans back into place. I twisted to look at my lower back in the mirror, surprised to find a set of tally marks cut into my skin. Once he was clothed again, DZ joined me at the mirror, running his thumb over the marks as I winced.

"One for every negative thought. I told you not to think," he explained softly, pulling me into his hold. "And maybe you'll learn to check your shower."