prelogue

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"yeahhhhh, go alexis" everyone cheered for me. At least I think, im too pissed to know. They were cheering for me to do a Snape impression.

I get I front of everyone, fire crackling and spitting smoke. I am stumbling, and I don't stand on my two feet.

"mhmhm... Alexis yoouu aarree dumb" I said and nailed the voice of Snape, tho the dialogue is true to my drunk ass.

I sit down laughing and some people talk but my brain can't keep up. Instead I light myself a fag until silence settles around the fire.

Until remus blurts out : "I'm gay" Peter spits out his drink and James is just shocked. I laugh, and raise my drink in the air. fuck it. "cheers to that mate, me too"

Everything is wild, but they got round to it. After some time I join James, Sirius and Remus on the beach, I plop down next to them and interupt whatever they were talking about.

"Petition to rename the marauders the fagauders" I say whilst taking a sip of my drink and looking up.

"absolutely not" They all say simultaneously.  " talking about fags, can I have a drag of yours, actually I don't care, give me your cig"

James leaves at some point, "this is awkward, I feel sexual tension, you guys are in love, even though you haven't told anyone yet, i know everything, anyways gotta dip, see you in your tents." I say while awkwardly getting up and stumbling on my feet.

"why would you be in my tent?" Sirius asks.
"To check if you and Remus are shagging of course." I say scoffing. "I am not gay for fucks sake Alex" I raise an eyebrow at him "Yeah ok keep telling yourself that mate" I scoff and actually leave them.

Fuck am I lonely, everyone is shagging and I'm smoking, lonely and without a man. I guess lonely is without someone. Ugh my head hurts.

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