Things I can't say out loud.

Ew Feelings.

It hurts. I won't deny it any longer, it really fucking hurts. I miss him so much and the fact that I can't get over him makes me want to tear my hair out and jump off a building.

He wasn't even mine to begin with???

We were friends -unfortunately- and then it turned to some screwed up shit that I can't understand. Why do I even like him? Okay I'm lying I do know why, I could list a hundred reasons why. That's beside the point. I keep crying and distracting myself to get rid of him but it doesn't help because he's fucking always there.

I don't want to tell my best friend because I feel like I'm annoying her by being one of those girls that can't get over someone and I fear that she's being noble by not stabbing me in the fucking tit. Probably going to bawl once I meet her and am sat on her bed. I really want chocolate. Best part? Its not the time of the month, im always this bipolar and random.

I write. I write so much because it's the only way I can vent. But sometimes I reach my limit and then all I want to do is cry again. I hope he's miserable that little fucking twat wanker knob head chavvy spastic piece of trash assbutt retarded moronic imbecilic idjit dickbag Cucumber cunt jerkwad piece of unicorn poop nickleback cd internet explorer crocs garbage!!11!1!1!!1!1!1!!!!

Okay I honestly don't want him to be sad because that would make me feel horrid. BUT I ALSO HOPE HE FUCKING GETS RUN OVER THE LIL SHIT.

But then he's so gorgeous and I wouldn't want his face ruined. He's also a beautiful person and technically I screwed the friendship up so-

HE CAN GET HIS HEAD STUCK IN THE FUCKING TOILET I DONT EVEN CARE NOPE NOT GONNA CARE NOPE NOPE.

I miss him. And I'm in love with him.

Fuck.