The Bullies and The Drummer(Lashton & Malum)

Chapter 18

* Ashton's P.O.V *

I woke up in Luke's arms causing a smile to spread across my face. He had his arms around my waist and his head was on the back of the beanbag chair and mine was on his chest.

I slipped away from his arms and I heard him whine but he just crossed his arm like he was holding some thing ,which made me smile, and he stayed asleep.

I got up and walked over to where I threw my diary and picked it up. I sighed remembering everything I wrote in there. Most of it was about the boys. I hope they don't leave after they finish reading it.

I flipped through the pages and to the back half of the little black book. Yeah black I know but it was a dark time in my life. Anyway, I read some of the songs I used to write and smiled at one of the songs as I started to sing it softly.

" Even when the sky is falling down
Even when the earth is crumbling 'round my feet

Even when we try to say goodbye
And you can cut the tension with a knife in here

'Cause I know what's happen
If we get through this

And if the earth ends up crumbling down to its knees baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out

And if the skyscrapers tumble down and crash around baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out

'Cause I feel so damn lost
And it comes with a cost of being alone

Everything is falling down
We're suffering, helpless thoughts and
Out we sing, prayers go to the sky

And if the ends up crumbling down to its knees baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out
Gotta get,gotta get,gotta get out

And if the skyscrapers tumble down and crash around baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out

And if we fall
It's not your fault
Shadows covering
Our selfish foes
And as our love,
Can go out on a high note

Even when the sky if falling down
Even when the earth is crumbling 'round my feet
Around my feet

And if the earth ends up crumbling down to its knees baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out
Gotta get,gotta get,gotta get out

And even if the skyscrapers tumble down and crash around baby
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out

We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out

We just gotta get out
We just gotta get out"

I smiled but then I heard someone clapping and I turned around to see Luke and Cal and Mikey woke up.

" Y-yiu guys didn't h-hear that didy you?" I asked.

They looked at each other confused.

" Yeah why?" Luke asked.

Tears formed in my eyes as I ran out of the room and into a bathroom. I locked the door and slid down in pulling my knees to my chest as I cried into them.

They must hate me. There going to make fun of me, because I sound horrible when I sing.

I heard knocking on the door and I heard Luke's voice through the door. "Ashton are you okay? " He asked. I looked up at the razors on the floor and started to pick them up. When I was finished I got up and started calming down.

After that I washed my face and walked out they were all looking at me. I looked down feeling embarrassed by how they listen to me sing.

" Ash are you okay? We didn't mean to make you sad."Calum said.

I shook me head looking down at my shirt sleeve and started playing with it. "I-Its fine, I promise. It's just t-that I don't like when people hear me sing. Every time I used to sing in music class they would say I was horrible so I stopped. Then when I would talk in class they would say that I have a girls voice so I stopped talking as well. They knew everything about my life." I said looking up and walking into the living room going through the dvd's.

" What are you talking about Ashy?" Luke asked me.

" They all know what I went through because there's a video of it. " I said holding up a dvd that says 'Ashton Irwin's home life' on it.

" Ashton...Who made that?" Mikey said.

" I-I don't know I got it in the mail one day and then I went to school the next day and there was a show in the auditorium and this was playing. No one stopped it every one was laughing saying that I enjoyed it," I said my voice cracking slightly." Saying that I-I would love to do it again. No one understood the pain I felt. No one understood the flashbacks I had every night! No one understood that I wanted to die to get away!" I said taking a deep breath. "I didn't go to school for a week after that. Everyone was saying I killed my self they just don't know how many times I tried to. But that damn neighbor kept finding me. When I came back I was bullied worse then ever. Not just by you guys but by the whole school. And the teachers didn't even care. It's like the universe wanted my death." I said sadly. I threw the dvd to the side and sat on the couch pulling my knees to my chest. I felt Luke's arms wrap around me. Causing me to look up at him.

" Everything is going to be okay now. I won't let anyone or anything hurt you. And do say that the universe wanted you to die. It wasn't it was putting you threw all of that so you could appreciate the good things that were coming in the future. And the best part is that you stayed. No matter how many times you tried to kill yourself. You made it through and guess what? That's pretty damn great in my eyes. You're pretty damn great in my eyes and I love that about you."

I smiled slightlyand looked up at him. "Thanks Lukey" I said softly, wrapping my arms around his waist nuzzling my face into his neck. He pulled me closer to him and kissed my forehead.

After we all calmed down we decided to watch a movie. We were watching Home. It was Luke's choice of course. But it was pretty good. Now we were all sitting here not really doing anything.

"Hey Ash?" Cal asked softly looking over at me from where he was laying on the love seat with Mikey.

" Yeah?" I said looking at him laying my head on Luke's chest.

" Did - did you write that song you were singing this morning?" He asked looking at me with his big brown eyes.

I nodded looking down at my sleeves and playing with them embarrassed. "Yeah I did, but it's not that good I wrote it a while ago." I mumbled.

" Ash that song was amazing what are you saying" Mikey said making me blush from the compliment.

I smiled slightly looking up at them. "Really?"

"Yes it was a great song Ashy." Luke said smiling making me smile up at him.

" Do you guys wanna read more songs?"

"Yeah!" They all said together making me jump. I giggled and nodded getting up and going to get the book.

When I got back they were all sitting on the couch waiting for me. I handed them the book and they started reading the songs in the back. And that's how the rest of our day went. Reading, singing, and eating of course. It was a great way to spend the morning.

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A/N Song on the side/top hope you liked it!:-p