Save Me From Myself...

chapter one

What if I didnt wake up tomorrow? What if I just disappeared. No one would care... well maybe Eric... but thats it... and pluse he could find someone a lot better than I...

"Sophia!" I heard my name being called.

I sat up and pulled the head phones out of my ears.

"Yeah?" I called back.

"Diner is ready" my dad says.

I get up off my bed and go to my mirror. I look at my face. Tear stained... dang I didnt even know I was crying...

I wipe off my face and put on a smile and straighten out my clothes. Before going down stairs.

As I was walking down stairs I could hear my step mom talking to her daughter cutting up and laughing. And same for my dad with my sister... when I walk in the kitchen everything got quiet... I give a half smile and grab a plate. After fixing my plate I sit down to eat. Everything is still quiet then I say.. "so I got excepted in to Wilmington today..." i hear my dad grunt and then he said "well your not going."

I stop chewing my food. "Why?" I ask.

"Cause im not gonna pay for you to go to a four year college and you fail." He says.

Tears already start to sting my eyes. "Fail?" I ask

"Yeah. Im gonna waist all that money to send you to the beach and with in two months your gonna be right back here." He said.

I dont say anything. I look down at my plate and push it away.

"Excuse me please." I say getting up.

I push my chair under the table and walk back to my room. When I get to the stairs I hear them laughing and cutting up again. Tears start rolling down my cheeks. Why cant I have that... I run to my room and close the door. I haven't done it in so long. I pick up my blade and start cutting away at my legs thighs and wrists.

Blood starts oozing out of my legs then I move to my thighs. Blood starts to cover them so I move to my wrists. I hesitate before cutting.. do I really want to cut my wrist? Its such a risky place... not because j could cut to deep and die.. I would t mind that... but the fact that icould get caught by someone seeing my cuts... my dad would have a cow... actualy the whole barn if you saw I had cuts on my arm...

I sigh should I? I look at the blade sitting on my wrist. Yes. I push down amd I start to se the blood. I move the blade ever so slowly a cross the unharmed flesh of my skin. And I keep going and going till finaly im asleep.