lovers in the outer banks

but i like him

pope's pov:

He hisses in a breath as I dab his face with alcohol

"I know," I say, "I know it hurts,". His face scrunches up even more, but by the time I've given him a band-aid, his face has relaxed until its just his brows that are still slightly furrowed. I gently place my finger on crease between them until he relaxes. 

Sometimes, it looks like someone has aged at least ten years from one moment to another. In the few days since I've last seen him, JJ could be an entirely different person that the one I saw with John B and Kiara, laughing and making jokes. His father takes it away from him, I guess, his youth. I notice the bags under his eyes, the way the corners of his mouth turn down in a natural frown when he's not trying too hard to smile. 

"Pope?" he whispers,

"Mhmm?"

"Do you actually like Kiara?". I guess I must look pretty surprised because he quickly adds, "Not in a mean way or anything, it's just-"

"Just what?"

"Well- nevermind," he turns his head, the tips of his ears are bright pink.  

We spend a long time like that, just sitting in silence as I disinfect the cuts on his knuckles. There were times where I could feel his gaze and I would suddenly feel his gaze fixed on me, and I would feel like I was roasting from the inside out. Probably global warming coming for our entire generation.

Eventually, we'd decided to go to the hot tub at John B's. He was out with Sarah somewhere for the weekend so we had the whole place for ourselves.

JJ's pov:

Did I buy a hot tub that one time to cope? Yes? Was it an irresponsible purchase? Probably. But, we use it all the time so who's really losing? Pope and I hop in the tub and look up at the stars. It feels good to relax in the warm bubbles after a long day. As usual, Pope is having an existensial crisis. I listen as he speaks. He's going on about the stars and how everything is this perfect coincidence and how vast space is. I just listen and feel small in the grand scheme of things.

"If just one atom had been in a different spot when the universe was created, there wouldn't have been a big bang, there wouldn't have been an earth, we don't even know what it would have been." he continues explaining

"And we never would have met," I say

"Thank god for that atom," I can hear the smile in his voice as he lifts his head, towards me. Sometimes, I don't understand why he's always trying to uncover the biggest mysteries of the universe when he can focus on the smaller ones, like why his eyes are so damn pretty right now.

It happens before I can stop myself. Without thinking I just go for it, leaning in and pressing my lips to his. I've wanted it to happen for so long it's practically muscle memory at this point. When I pull away, he looks stunned. I immediately start apologizing, I go on and on, rambling my apologies.

"Shut up JJ and let me kiss you."