On This Roller Coaster That We Call Life-z.j.m [[discontinued]]

Chapter 41

Deeandra's POV

Stupid thunder….scaring me like that. Making me drop Zayn’s glass. I bit my lip back hard, holding in the tears that were welling in my eyes. I felt embarrassed and stupid. It’s just a loud sound. I was about to start cleaning up my mess when I heard a door open. “Oh no! Don’t clean it. What if you cut yourself or something? I’ll do it.” I saw a still shirtless Zayn step into the kitchen. He looked tired.  He ran his hand through his slightly damp hair and smiled at me. I didn’t know how to respond. I just kinda stood there like an idiot and nodded. I finally turned on my heels and started slowly walking up the stairs. I looked back a little to see Zayn getting onto his knees and carefully pick up the shards of glass. Am I really gonna let him clean up my mess? I turned back around and walked towards Zayn.

I got beside him on my knees and started helping him clean the broken glass. It was kinda like symbolism to me. Zayn and I’s relationship is a bit broken like this glass. But we can just pick up the pieces and clean up. Is this what Ed Sheeran meant by ‘I’m gonna pick up the pieces and build a lego house?’ It’s that simple…right? After we had picked up the visible pieces of glass, we both walked over to the trash and threw them in at the exact same time. Our hands touched. I didn’t pull mine away. Neither did he. Our eyes slowly traveled from our hands to our faces. His beautiful hazel orbs pierced right through mine. I saw so much in his eyes. Hope, love, promise. Tints of sorry and regret too. I was falling in love all over again. His eyes made their way to my lips. Back up to my eyes. Back down to my lips. No Dee. He cheated on you. You’re mad. You’re upset. He hurt you. You wanna hurt him back. You wanna make him feel your pain. You wanna kiss him so hard… Who am I kidding. NO ONE can resist those lips of his. I did as I knew he wanted me too. I leaned in.

Our lips crashed into each other’s hard. We were both so hungry for each other’s taste. His hand rested upon my hip, gripping gently. My hands were on his chest as our kiss got more and more intense. Our lips moving in perfect sync. Eventually both of his hands were on my hips, gripping a little more then gently. He was slowly inching my body more towards him. I was finally pressed up against him. My arms around his neck, his around my waist. His lips traveled down to my neck. Sucking, biting and licking here and there. I leaned my head back, enjoying every second. His hands slipped down to my butt and started rubbing slowly. My eyes shot open. What am I doing? What is he doing? What are we doing? I pulled away from his grasp.

“Wh-what?...What happened?” Zayn asked quietly, looking at me with surprise. I rubbed my arm nervously. I need to speak up. “You cheated on me last night, Zayn. That’s what happened…” I looked down. I didn’t wanna see his perfect face twist into sadness. “….I know…I know I did. I fucking hate me for it…But Deeandra, you have to underst-“ Oh no, he didn’t. “Understand? Understand what? What am I stupid, Zayn? I need to understand? No, YOU need to understand. When you ask a girl out, have her move into your house and sleep in the same bed as you, you don’t hurt her by having sex with some other girl! What you did was not okay and I’m mad about it. Why are you trying to correct what you did with hugs and kisses? It won’t change what happened last night.” I felt the tears coming in again. God, I am so tired of crying already though. “You hurt me, Zayn…I love you and you hurt me…”