We Can Run, Or We Can Die [Frerard]

Thirteen|Two Kisses, Twenty Conundrums

The mood in the car was sombre that night, and with the rain lashing against the windows, the four men found it hard to sleep. Ray eventually drifted off, long after the sun had set, and Bert was in one of those exhausted-but-will-wake-at-the-slightest-noise stupors.

Frank and Gerard, however, were kept awake by the sound of the rain and the thoughts rushing through their heads. Gerard couldn't stop thinking about Ryan, and his gun, and zombies, and Mikey. He reread Brendon's diary while Frank leant against him, eyes wide open and staring ahead.

Frank didn't want to admit it, but he was scared.

"I don't think Brendon was completely at fault." Gerard spoke quietly, making the younger jump.

"What?" He blinked, looking up at Gerard, who shrugged. "He cheated on Ryan. He walked into a horde of zombies in order to kill himself. He lied to everyone."

"No, but...if you read the entire book, from start to finish, it's obvious how much he loved Ryan."

"Not a lot, by the sounds of it."

"He loved him more than anything."

"So you're saying that if you got cheated on, you'd believe that they actually love you?"

Gerard frowned, trying to process the tone of the conversation and failing. It was a stupid thing to think, because everyone looked down on cheating, but there was more to it than that. There was Dallon Weekes, who was manipulative and sexy, and Brendon's boss. There was the fact that he was new and exciting, despite Ryan being safe, and home, and comfortable.

"Well...people have worked through it before..."

"If you're cheated on, that person does not love you. They stopped thinking about you long enough to be with someone else, and if it happens again, they continued to stop thinking about you. They stopped making you their number one. They stopped caring."

Gerard frowned even further, lines almost permanently stitched into his forehead. "Frank - were you cheated on?"

The younger turned away, folding his arms. "No, I just...have a problem with people throwing away their relationships and betraying those that love and trust them."

Gerard curled his fingers under Frank's chin, pulling his face around so that their eyes met. Leaning closer, he smiled, whispering, "Hey...I would never betray you."

And there it was, that treacherous lump in Frank's throat, the one that told him to tell Gerard everything, absolutely everything, stop being a damned liar! He opened his mouth, and his words died on his lips as he leaned forward, with Gerard meeting him halfway.

It was slightly awkward and a little sloppy, due to the fact that neither had kissed anyone in a long time, but soon Frank was holding onto Gerard's shirt like it was his lifeline, and in reality it was. Gerard seemed to be the only thing stopping himself from running and doing exactly what Ryan did, except he didn't have a gun, just his knife, and...

They broke apart, and unbeknown to either of them, Bert had been watching, waking at the wrong moment to see them with locked lips, and he turned away as it ended, closing his eyes. He'd never really felt heartache before, not like this, not from seeing his beloved Gerard kissing someone else, someone whom he couldn't decide whether he liked or not. He didn't want to hear them whispering to each other. He didn't want to hear them kissing again. He didn't want to hear them shifting in the back or think about them holding each other as they waited for the sun to rise.