Pessi's Taste in Music Sucks (And Here's Why)

Weezer? What Are You, 12?

Of course he listens to Weezer. If Weezer had a niche, it would be in upholding an average sound. Weezer is a band only for those specific hipsters who see themselves as too good to listen to anything "mainstream" while still only listening to SOMETHING MAINSTREAM. Pessi, all this has told us about your personality is the fact that you're a big fat virgin who will never experience the loving touch of a woman.

The blending of the guitar in Weezer songs sounds like the mud my brother used to eat and throw up as a child. Pessi must be deaf to genuinely enjoy the sound of gritty sludge. Like genuine, rocky mud. Not the thin, watery stuff, but the thick and dense mud.

Pessi also thinks he's so cool in only liking specific songs. Bestie literally only likes the most generic and mainstream shit that this band vomits out and serves through a McDonald's drive through. I bet he calls his music taste "underground" too.

I think what we can take from this experience is the fact that Pessi is seriously harming his dateability by listening to this god awful band that emits the aura of living in your parent's basement. If he dropped Weezer then maybe he would be able to finally get a girlfriend.