All This Time

Chapter 25

It was a long process of goodbyes for me. I think everyone could sense I didn't want to leave.

Bucky didn't say anything after I told him where I was going and I did tell Sam that Bucky was coming with me. To which he smirked and nodded.

We left after that and I didn't look back. Literally, as we walked away I couldn't, it hurt too much. I only hope I can come back here someday.

On the walk I let him know I was not going to take a plane but a train over there since it wasn't that far away.

He didn't mind.

I was mainly worried about him being able to board at such last minute but surprisingly there weren't many people getting on this train so we had many available seats and he picked the one closest to me.

We ended up in a little dispute on who should pay his and I won of course. I didn't mind and since it was last minute the ticket was pretty pricey so I insisted.

Once we got on there weren't many people aboard and we waited until the attendant there let us know we were about to leave. Once we felt the train taking off slowly at first that's when Bucky scooted over to the seat next to him so he could have a better view of me. Considering there were maybe five people sitting in our section and no one next to Bucky.

He smiled at me and me feeling lazy I smile back barely being able to keep my eyes open.

He tilted his head like he did back when we were with Zemo in his plane. That felt like forever ago.

"Go to sleep," he says softly across from me seeming amused.

I didn't respond I just shook my head.

He looked at me confused before asking.

"Why?"

I gave him a knowing look and his face falls a bit as he looks down at his hands.

He then looks around for a second and I watch cautiously wondering what he's planning. That's when he gets up and walks across and sits right next to me.

His smile being very striking as he looks at me now.

He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arm around me.

"What are you doing?" I ask now alarmed.

"Go to sleep. I'll be here in case you scream bloody Mary. I'll shake you before you can holler a thing," he says now with the sweetest smile.

I was touched by him willing to do that.

"No it's fine," I say pulling away suddenly feeling embarrassed.

"Hey," he says softly grabbing my face to turn my chin in his direction. "I know what you're going through. You don't need to hide it from me," he says as I look into his pretty blue eyes.

I feel my eyes become glossy.

"I would've thought you knew that by now."

I felt a surge of guilt. He's right but I can't help feel embarrassed and if he knows what I'm going through then he should understand why I didn't tell him.

"And I would've thought that if you knew what I was going through you'd understand why it's not easy for me to let you or anyone see that," I say barely audible.

He seems to hear it though as his smile fades.

I hear him sigh and I look at him pulling a forced one before speaking up again.

"You need sleep. How long are you really going to last? This is a long ride..."

I look outside to the sky and think about it. I guess I can't stay awake for this whole ride.