When The Smoke Is In Your Eyes (l.s.)

0.35

23.04.15

~*~

It had been three months since he'd last spoken to Harry. Three months since the kiss. Even he would admit it was his fault. Harry had tried, sent him texts and snapchat videos of his new room and his new everything but Louis just read and didn't reply. Eventually there was nothing new to read.

As cheesy as it sounded Louis felt life was almost different without Harry. The boy was a whirlwind of crazy hair and lame jokes, drunk messages at 4am and cuddles in bed. He was a whirlwind that Louis was stuck in and as much as he tried he couldn't get out of.

A life without Harry was something Louis didn't want to imagine and he hadn't even known the guy a year. Then he went and ignored him and ruined it all. The situation Louis was in had turned him into somewhat of a recluse. He went to school, did his homework, met with his friends, helped his mum, played with his sisters but he was distant and everyone knew. Almost as if he was trying to get over a break up that never really happened.

The cold December sun was shining through his window on the Saturday just 12 days before his sixteenth birthday. His sisters had been taken out by their grandparents to buy their mum a Christmas present as they'd told him. It was only 9:30 but he was awake which wasn't normal for him when he had the chance to lie in as late as he wanted.

Despite the protest his body made he pulled himself out of bed, opening his bedroom door and walking softly as the cream carpet on the landing to his mums room. The door was open a crack and he could hear the TV playing, an old episode of Jeremy Kyle playing while his mum lay in bed and read a magazine.

"Mummy." Louis said softly, pushing the door open a little more and stepping into the room.

"Morning boo, what's up?" She replied, putting down her magazine and lifting the side of the duvet as an invitation for Louis to get into bed with her.

As soon as he'd climbed under the cover he pressed his cold toes against his mums leg and cuddled close to her.

"Wanna talk about it?" Jay asked, running her fingers through his hair and kissing his head.

He shook his head, letting them fall into a comfortable silence with only the sound of Jeremy and the guests on his show to keep it from a dead silence.

"Have you ever made a mistake?" Was what he asked after a few minutes of thinking over what he was going to say.

"I've made loads of mistakes sweetie, people do and that's what makes people people."

"But like a really bad mistake? A mistake that could change a lot of things."

"Like what boo?"

"Like kissing someone you should't have..." He trailed off, looking at his mum in hopes she'd understand but she just stared down at him with a confused expression.

"What are you trying to get at here love?" She prompted.

"I kissed Harry. Three months ago, we kissed and I've ignored him for three months." Louis admitted and saying it out loud made him want to cry so he did, letting a few tears roll down his cheeks.

"Oh boobear," Jay sighed, pulling her son into her arms and kissing his head, "it's okay darling."

"It's not okay mum, he tried to talk to me and I just ignored him and I'm so stupid and he probably doesn't even like me."

"Look at me Lou," she said, tucking a hand under his chin and lifting his head, "why did you kiss him?"

"What?"