Person can only fall in love once in his life.
That time it was too deep, too painful. We ask ourselves, when was the first time we fell in love ? Was it on February 2nd or July 31st ? Was it ever ? If one's needs to ask this questions, he knows that love was a skin-like dream. Could it be childish or unrealistic ? It was. I felt nothing there, it was hollow. Terrifying thing is that I was not satisfied with longtime love, only loving from distance. Loving in shadow. Loving deeply but not truly. Loving myself but not you. Loving with words but not from heart.
Now, it is different. Only simple look, simple read turned my head upside down. I feel dead, I feel empty but yet I can't decide what to do. Text me, text me please if you can. I am desperate to hear from you. Somehow it is scary to look at person, loving them. I feel shame, despite all the love I gave to you. One's realized that it is tough to fall for some else. God, it is possible. However, I will keep loving you in shadow in my own mind. Desperate to know new personality of yours.
Love you
Your Minni-j