The Unsloved Broken Soul

The Beginning Of Everything.

I was only 13 when I became a lesbian . It was a crazy experience to even think I would become one ,when my family is always all about God . I always wanted to be different. Be the one who wears jeans to church , hair in a ponytail ,nice sneakers,stud earrings and always wore a gold watch . The first girlfriend I had was in 2nd grade . I never told my mom cause I felt like she would judge me and disclaim me as her child . So I Hid it until the age of 15. By that time she already knew something . I know she did. She would always tell me "Asia Don't Be Like Nobody Else , Be Yourself ". We talked about what I wanted to do in life. I told her I wanted to go into the WNBA. She said you'll never make it going down the road you going on . At the time I was smoking weed ,stealing ,doing robberies and taking anything I got my hands on . I did it to fit in the crowd I was with . It got me nowhere in life but in trouble with the law and in trouble in school . I cried at night praying I wouldn't grow older and still be the same . Even though I grew up with God in my life I still have the devil in me . I can't lie I made mistakes and I'm still on progress of making more in my life . I told God I just wanted to leave this earth just because now I had a record .I cried on my way to school one day cause my momma told me she hated me cause I was being the person I wanted to be .I skipped school so many times because of the missing , unsloved pieces of my heart . They were just up and gone . I fought every week to get my anger out . I fought girl and boys from the age of 10-19 . I didn't care I they beat my ass. I still wanted to try and kill any person I could get my hands on , because I had so much evil in me .