FOMO - Fear of Missing Out

Chapter 1

The incessant rumbling of privileged white males in the room makes me zone out of the charity gala for about 3 hours. We all already know you and your sons are rich and successfull at least in the way you make use of the word.
There I stood - "pretty" as my father praised when he saw me hours before the event. I just keep nodding and smiling trying to ignore the way these full grown men objectified me and paraded me in front of their sons. We are in the twentieth first century for God's sake. I have my own life and don't need any man to support me. Yes, I'm lucky to have a fortune of my own but that never stopped me from working a day in my life. My parents had a hard time trying to concieve and after many loses they had me. They love me of course, after all they are my parents, but sometimes I think they perhaps would've prefered to have had a boy. At least this oldfashioned society of entitled noblemen and women sure seem to think so.

"Norah" my mom calls my name pulling me from my thoughts. "Honey, say goodbye to the duke and duchess, it's our time to go." she grabs my arm pulling me closer to her. My feet are killing me. How can women literally stand around all day in these while smiling and not being bitchy, that's a serious mystery to me.

We say our goodbyes to the hosts and their friends and head out to where my father is expecting us close to the press people here to promote the event. The cars in the humongous driveway probably cost more than what these people donated to the children's hospital, the sole purpose of this gala. Our car being, of course, one of them. My father inherited his title and with that came all the family money and estate. "Are my two beautiful ladies ready to go?" he asks holding the car door for us.

♡♡♡

Today is my boyfriends Lewis' birthday and because of the event I had to cancel our dinner plans as I was not sure to be ready in time to make it. I always try to bring Lewis along when I can. Most of the time against my father's wishes, let's just say he's not too fond of him. However, today Lewis bailed himself out. I wouldn't want to spend my birthday like that either so I completely understand but I had to go. It is what's expected of me.

We got off way earlier than I anticipated so I had my parents drop me off at his place in the city. I didn't even get to change. I'm wishing to have left some more comfortable clean clothes at his apartment as I usually spend some nights here. I kiss my parents goodbye and grab Lewis' present closing the car door behind me.

I enter the familiar foyer and head to the lift. I press the button to the penthouse and check myself on the polished golden mirrored surface.

Lewis also comes from wealth although not of english nobility. His dad is an American busisnessman and maybe that's the reason my father butts heads with him. He hates Americans but for no apparent reason.

We met in secondary school but only started dating two years after - Gosh! It has been almost six years!  Time seriously goes by too fast.
He was the one to ask me out and I, of course, said yes. He was kind and made me feel safe, as he still does to this day.
Nowadays we try spending as most time as we can together but I'm always traveling, working in a non-profit organization, and he has his job here. It's not easy but we make do with the time we have. He invited me to move in with him a couple years back but with that came also the question to settle down "You have the opportunity to not work at all so why do it?" he asked me. That just made me furious at the time. I'm not some trophy to look pretty on a shelf and be there for him. I told him I have my own interests and I want my life to have meaning. Having money gives me more doors to help others so why pretend everything is right in the world and not try to fight for those who can't alone?
That was the last time we touched the issue. Now we just ignore the enormous pink elephant in the room. I understand he might be planning to start a family with me soon but I'm not ready and that just makes me feel guilty because, in the end, I'm the one putting his life on hold.

The elevator does that ding! when it reaches the top floor. I juggle to open the dor with my clutch and his present in my hands. Once I manage to do it I tiptoe into the apartment.
"Lewis I'm home!" I call for him but without any answer. The apartment is dark and his keys are not on the bowl we usually put them on. He must've gone out with our friends to celebrate. I leave my heels and put down my things, grabbing my phone to send him a text telling him I'm here. I head to the bedroom's bathroom so I can take off my make up and take a shower. I don't bother turning on any lights until I reach the bathroom.

I'm taking of my makeup when I lok in the mirror and notice a pink lace bra on the floor near the bathroom door. That sure isn't mine. I'm pretty sure I could fit my head in one of those cups and I'm as flat as it gets in that department.

I turn on the bedroom lights and notice the clothes on the floor first. Then my eyes shoot up to the bed where I'm pretty sure someone is on under the covers. I grab the duvet pulling it down. My brain not believing what my eyes are witnessing. I must be having hallucinations. What in the world did they put in the champagne? "Charlotte?" my throat is dry and it ends up sounding like a grunt. "What the fuck is happening? What the hell... Lewis?" I look perplexed at them as my best friend and boyfriend try to cover themselves up. "How?What... Charlotte?"

"It's not what it seems..." she says with only a bed sheet around her very naked body. She tries to reach for me but I take a step back putting more distance between us.

"It very much seems as if you two were in bed together... NAKED... in bed... TO-GE-THER! What..." I keep cursing under my breath. I think I'm going to pass out. I take a deep breath. "How did this even happen? Wait! How long has this been happening?" I look at her waiting. Do I really want to even know?

"2 years" she says and looks down at her perfectly painted red long nails. I just want to jab them in her eyes. I could murder her right now -and Lewis. The bastard just stands there looking at me without saying a word.

"But- but you are my bestfriend! What the ..." I continue rumbling on. How did I end up here? These two are the people I the trust most apart from my family."I cannot believe you could do this! I-I hate that I fell for your crap..." I point at Lewis' dickhead face "2 YEARS!" I can't move. I can't breath. I feel like someone is sitting on my chest.

"Try to calm down Norah! Just Breath!" Charlotte tries to come closer and that's when I snap to reality.

"Calm down?! What in the world is wrong with tou two?" I keep looking at them. My eyes are burning. I bite the inside of my cheek to hold back the tears. I think I'm going to through up all the canapés I ate. I need to get out of here. I need to get out! I need to go right now!

I don't give them the satisfaction to watch me cry. I feel like my world crumbling down. I run out of the door barefoot leaving behind everything including my heart.