The Best Kind of Betrayal

Chapter 12

Kaia immediately reaches for my hand when she meets me after school. I saw her waiting for me in the parking lot, chatting happily with a group of seniors nearby, but the smile immediately leaves her face when she sees me. She looks worried and chews on her lower lip, which she rarely does, because she works hard for nice, soft lips.

"I heard everything," Kaia declares dramatically and grabs my face, "How are you?" 

Whatever she heard, I definitely didn't.

"What?" I say and free myself from her hold, "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb," Kaia sighs impatiently and grabs both of my hands, "I know everything. You talked with Logan, didn't you? I heard you guys were fighting! As in a big deal!"

I furrow my brows. "Who told you that?"

"I have my sources."

I don't doubt that, but I was fairly certain no one was watching my embarrassing talk with Logan. Then again, we weren't that far away from the clubroom. Anyone could have seen us.

"Also, it wasn't a big deal," I say, "Just the usual Logan nonsense. He doesn't get why I'm mad at him, he didn't do anything wrong, he wants us to be friends again, yada yada yada. Oh, he also thinks I only joined to club to get back with him or something."

"Oh really?" Kaia raises an eyebrow and the fact she knows me a little too well isn't doing me any favors, "Why does he think that?"

"Um," I feel my face flush, "I may have mentioned I liked him. But past tense! Definitely past tense."

"You confessed?" Kaia stares at me with wide eyes, "Are you serious?"

"Past tense!" I repeat frantically, "I told him I liked him, but like, only over summer. I mean, it's the truth, I don't see why I can't tell him. He's still on about us not being serious anyway." 

Kaia doesn't look like she shares that sentiment.

"June, seriously? Was this really necessary?"

"Why not?"

Kaia huffs in annoyance and shakes her head.

"Logan now probably thinks you're really desperate, since he's with someone new but you're still crying after him. He told you he thinks you're in the club to get back with him? Now wonder, after you declared your undying love."

"I didn't declare my undying love, Jesus."

"You told him you liked him after you broke up! It's basically the same!" Kaia seems really upset, "I mean, I really don't understand why you did that. It's not like you want to get back with him, right?"

"No!"

I stare at her in disbelief, because getting back with Logan? After everything he did? Okay, I really liked what we had over summer. There's no need to deny that. I also enjoyed being someone's girlfriend, thinking about Logan late at night, being excited to see him the next day. But knowing it was just some fun hook-up situation to him, knowing he had no problem to replace me with Vivian, leaves a bad taste on all of our happy memories. I groan and rub my temples. I feel like I'm getting a headache.

Kaia watches me all worried as I start my car and finally get us out of the parking lot and on the way home.

"June," she says, "I'm sorry. I just don't want to see you hurt."

"Well, but I am."

"And that's okay," Kaia says quickly, "But I'm mad Logan now knows just how much he hurt you. It feels like he's winning. I don't like that."

I sigh. It doesn't feel like he won, it feels like I lost. I lost the second Logan decided to dump me and it hurts ever since. But I don't tell Kaia that.

"It's fine. I don't care," I say instead.

"But –"

"Kai. Don't worry about me." 

"You always say that," Kaia whispers and looks out of the window.

I give her a quick glance before focusing back on the road. "Well, because it's true."

Kaia only huffs and I know she's mad at me. We don't talk for the rest of the drive, but she gives me a smile when I stop in front of her house.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she says, "Text me if you're late." 

I wave and watch her runup her driveway and into her house. It feels like I failed my decision to not makeKaia worry about me spectacularly and I hate myself for it. This needs tochange. I feel like if the situation with Logan doesn't change soon Kaia'sgoing to do something drastic.