I'm now. Present... No.
He's here.
I'm not here am I?
I look at him.
He looks at me.
Leans in for a kiss.
I shouldn't if i want him to hate me so he won't save me, I shouldn't if I want him to be saved, I shouldn't if I want him to be safe.
I can't. I cannot deny him. It breaks my heart... He would think I hate him but I would never hate someone like him, just his eyes show the love I never experienced. I never loved before. Never had I had a friend before. Never had anyone loved me before. If this is love I wish I were forever loveless.
And so I let him kiss me. I almost scratch his back. In fact I think already since he winced but I won't let this moment go, he's safe right now I will protect him now, he won't die now, I'll die instead I wont let him die. He pulls out of the kiss and stares at me...
"Don't blame yourself."
That's all he says.
Then he kisses me again.
And I kiss him back again.
And again.
And again.
And again.....
