In A Heartbeat

Chapter 5

Blood , lots of blood . I can hear the sounds of a man dying and dying at my own hand.  What is it about horror that loves to stick to the human mind. I never had bad dreams about the bad things I've done. I never felt the trauma of it and quite honestly I do not enjoy being bombarded by the ugliness of my sins. I am reminded everyday that I am alive that I have done bad things to people. Yet no one knows what bad things I've had done onto me. Being someone of colour has always been a bit difficult, getting to where I got was extremely hard and I worked hard for it. I do have one trauma that I went through. I had a special person a few years ago. I loved him dearly , he was such a funny man great way with women that's for sure. Long story short, I found out he was cheating and I wanted to leave him. He didn't allow me to leave and  instead proceeded to rape me and beat me until I had bruises all over my body. Luckily I gathered the strength to report him and he's been arrested since. I still remember he tried to stab me but I fought for my life and I still have the scar on my arm where the knife scraped my flesh. I have a missing tooth as well but it's at the back so no one can really see it. It still shocks me to this day that someone can actually hurt me like that, someone that claimed to love me. Love can be so painful, it hurts so bad but maybe it's not so bad when it teaches you something. Aside from my sad relationship fail, I had friends turn their backs on me and I somehow attracted jealous vicious females claiming I'm taking their men. I did nothing but remain quiet and stay away from them but they would find me and they also beat me to a pulp to the point pieces of hair were ripped out of my scalp and my arm was broken along with a busted lip that left a scar across my top lip. I was weak back then, I took everything that people threw at me. I never bothered to defend myself simply because I did not want to hurt anyone.

It's almost irony admitting that I never wanted to hurt someone before considering what I done a few years later. Truth is , I only done 3 hits. I hate that I took their lives but these people were rapists and pedophiles otherwise I would not have done the jobs. Whether I repent my sins and attempt to right my wrongs , the consequences of my actions will soon follow. 

I washed my face and got into the shower. Just as the water hit my face I turned around and let the water get through my hair , dampening my curly strands letting it weigh down to the middle of my back. All of a sudden Kane came into my mind. I wonder what he's up to at this very moment. Is he still asleep? I am surprised he hasn't called me yet considering it's 12 in the afternoon. I nearly forgot he was my target in the midst of all the moving , getting settled and meeting Hermes my focus shifted away from Kane. I shook my head, I have had men occupy my brain too much lately.

I called my family and made sure they were okay and let them how I'm doing. Today was a beautiful day I decided to go for a jog and workout. I got my water bottle , watch and phone with my headphones and headed out the door. Sunny blue sky, only some clouds outside and birds flew around, worms from the previous day's downpour. The sweet and bitter smell of nature hit my nostrils and I feel a warmth in my chest as I run and run past my house and entering the town. As I walk by the coffee shop , someone hands me a newspaper and I thank them. I did not read newspapers I guess they keep them around for the elderly people so I decided to indulge in the idea of reading the newspaper and drinking some coffee.

I sat down , and read up on some news but quickly closed it because already plenty of negative news as usual. I watched the people of the town walk by and order. I love this town. I took out my phone , scrolled through Instagram and Twitter. I felt the urge to text Kane but I shrugged it off

" Who knew someone could look so beautiful in her lonesome presence" Kane said
I was shocked because when people say speak of the devil they really mean it. Just as the thought hit my mind I remembered the first time I saw him. I could've sworn his eyes had some red in there. I decided to really look into his eyes today.
" You look sexy today, what's with the outfit" I ask eying him up. He had a dark blue and white flannel shirt , a white T shirt , and loose fit black cargo pants black Valentino Garavani combat boots , and a BVLGARI Octo Finissimo watch . He had his hair parted down the middle too. He looked so good it gave me heart palpitations.
" Really? I'm glad you like it I don't really have a reason to look sexy but I'll always look good for you I think I should mention I also taste sexy if you'd like a taste" he said and reached over the table to grab my hand and kisses it. I look away and hide my smile. Only demons can fluster you like this.
" I think I will pass thank you very much anyway what are you up to today?" Now I'm looking into his eyes. They don't have the red speckles I thought I saw they were in fact a plain opaque , jet black. They were so dark but you can see a smidge of brown when they hit the light. His eyelashes were pretty long but that's no surprise to me considering that most men have long eyelashes. Insert dramatic eye roll.
" I was just going to see a few friends from work , but I will clear my schedule for you and you only I would also like to know why you just looked at me like that" he says with a raised eyebrow. I feel my cheeks get hot.
" Well , the very first time I saw you I could have sworn I seen red in your eyes" I admit.
" Red? Ezra are you implying that I have demon eyes?" He asks with almost a snort of a laugh. Annoying . I know how ridiculous it sounds
" Yes Kane. Red demon eyes which you obviously aren't right?" I ask.
" I am one hundred percent not a demon but I will bring out my demon only for you" he says and then looks like he got a thought.