Escucha Me (Collegian Short Stories)

Escucha Me

Street lights flickering, few vehicles passing by and a comforting evening, moments like this are luxurious for me. The cold breeze kissed my skin. I closed my eyes as I held my bag tightly. 

I’d like to recall my learnings earlier but I guess my brain ceased to function because of the accounting problems I faced today. Does the brain stop from being used excessively? I laughed inwardly. What am I thinking?

As I was walking, I heard a man’s voice shouting for my name. “Kate!”

I turned around to see who that was. It’s Jester, my blockmate. He was running towards me. His backpack behind him, bouncing.

“Good thing I saw you. I forgot to return your calc that I borrowed.”

I reached out my hand to get the calculator from him and I slid it inside my back. “Thank you. I will need this later.” He smiled at me. I returned him a force one. I can’t even curve my lips into a good smile  right now. My entire body is too tired.

Under the streetlamps, we were just walking side by side without much talking. But then he broke the silence, “Do you seldomly leave school this late?”

I nodded. “I had to clean the comfort rooms,” I uttered dryly. My throat is a desert right now.  “—it’s part of my scholarship.”

I was fortunate to be one of the scholars in our school's program. It wasn't an academic scholarship. I needed to work and render service as an exchange for that free tuition. I didn't have a problem with it anyway. Task-management (as I call it) is the key. 

He nodded and glanced at me sideways. “I see. Must be too tiring? Study accounting in daylight and work in the evening.”

I didn’t answer. It was all tiring indeed. But I had no choice. 

From here I can almost hear the ugly remarks by the bystanders in the neighborhood. They were looking at us. I knew that smirks.  I heaved a big sigh. 

When we're near the slums where I was residing, I bid goodbye to Jester. 

Now, it’s time to activate my prowess. From where I was standing, I disabled my ears from hearing and my mouth from speaking. Don't ever look back, Kate. You got this. 

“Hey, Kate! Was that your new boytoy?”

“Boytoy? Man, it’s her new client! This b*tch has to be rewarded.”

“What a joke."

"Hey, flirt.”

“Do you even go to school? Or you were just in a brothel all day?” 

"Hahaha!"

I was familiar with all of these. I chose not to listen, as I always does, but their voices were purposefully loud. 

“What can we expect from Kate? Her mother’s a prostitute, should we expect this one to be a holy?” After that slandering remark, their boastful laughter and sniggers followed. I can stomach all of that. I'd like to believe that all this don't have a power over me but—

“What’s your dream, Kate? Certified—what? Certified courtesan? Public call girl? You’d earn bigger money in being a courtesan than being an accountant! Kate! Choose wisely!” Upon hearing that, I gritted my teeth in fury. I walked fast as I balled my both hands into fists. 

No, no, no. Don’t think about it, Kate. Those were just flies trying to ruin your ears. They can't harm you. 

Their words can’t harm you.

Or so I thought. Because that night, I wasn’t able to study despite serious trying. I scanned my book and forced myself to read but it felt like I was now deprived of the capability to read.

Her mother’s a prostitute, should we expect this one to be a holy?

You’d earn bigger money in being a courtesan than being an accountant!

Letters and numbers in my Income Taxation book were now dancing to the rhythm of the ugly remarks that were playing inside my head. 

I can't focus. I'd fail. I'd fail if I don't study. I'd fail this if I can't read. I'd fail. 

My heart continued beating loudly and erratically. I can feel my whole body shivering and sweating. Please, please. I just wanted to study. 

***

The next day, I failed 4 major quizzes. But why? I don't understand. Even if I wasn’t able to study last night, I did well in our class discussions. I knew that. I have learned those things already!  What went wrong?

As I walked home in the evening, those things happened again.

“Your bawd mother visited earlier! Oh man, still as hot as hell!”

I was about to pass them but a man blocked my way. I saw him ogling me from head to foot.

I glared at him. If my eyes could kill, he's probably in his burial by now. 

“Dude, like mother like daughter!”

I am obviously smaller than them. And they're many. Kicking won't be of help. 

Then there’s another who came near. “Do you accept installments, Kate? My place,” and he placed his dirty arm on my shoulder. 

“Hey! What are you doing?!”

***

“Kate,” Alena  forcefully grabbed my arm. It hurts. But I don't care. “Why are they harassing you? And why are you allowing them to do that to you?!” 

W-What? Did I allow any of those encounters? Was it my choice to be harassed? 

My eyes began to water. I looked at her. I can't see Alena's image clearly but I looked at her nonetheless. 

Everyone, here is the mother who abandoned me to my foster mom fifteen years ago.  The mother who was the root and reason for why I was receiving harassment and slander across the street. The one who made it hard for me to dream.

“Why not? When all they said are true! D-Do you think a prosti’s daughter would receive warm acknowledgement from people?  A warm appreciation perhaps?! Do you think those men will treat me as how a lady should be treated after knowing all your doings? Alena, we're different. But they're treating me as if we shared the same destiny just because you're my mother!"

I wanted to reach her but my knees became weaker and weaker. "Why do people persecute me for something I had no control of?”

My knees lose its balance and I stumbled even before I came near her. 

All I ever wanted was to dream freely! To sail away and reach my dreams! To fulfill all my desires. To walk in the streets without the fear of being harassed.  But it felt like my wings were incapable of flying; its feathers were now missing and forever lost. 

“I can’t fly because of you, Alena.”

I was staring blankly at my ceiling when I got startled by a sudden sound. Something fell. I drew a deep breath. I picked my phone from the floor and turned it on—only to see that I had been doing nothing for three hours now. 

I wish I could say it all to you, Alena. 

But you were unfair. 

You can’t even clean your name now that you're in heaven.