𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 ; hatake kakashi (discontinued)

23 ✧ caregiver

"I just want to get closer to you even if you don't want that. I'm sorry."
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"Do you ever think about us?" (Y/n) asked the male next to her, a pondering gaze directed at the multitude of small children doing various activities ahead of her. Her own blond child a few feet away separated from the majority of the other children, but with his own small group of children. It was obvious that they were probably the only children that didn't discriminate against him. The thought made the older female slightly grimace. How it easy it was for children to idolize adult's opinions and actions. Not knowing if they were good or not.

Kakashi's only visible eye widened at the vague question. His heart stuttering for a mere second before regulating itself. "What do you mean by us?" He smoothly questioned back, turning his head to the side to glance back at the female. His fingers gripping the rough rope of the swing he was currently sitting on a little too tight. The two young adults happened to be currently occupying the swing set due to it being unused.

(Y/n) turned her gaze away from the children to stare back at Kakashi. Her (e/c) eyes meeting the male's own eyes. "You know, how we've been running into each other quite frequently." An amused grin slowly painted itself across her facial features, mischief making itself clear in her eyes. It made Kakashi narrow his own eyes at the female. Already knowing what was to come.

"Don't start." Kakashi bluntly stated, rolling his eyes before turning his gaze away from his companion. Hating the way a familiar heat spread on his face hidden away from the other's gaze due to his mask. The embarrassment settling within his chest.

"What do you think I meant by that?" (Y/n) teasingly grinned back, blatantly ignoring the male's request.

"Nothing." Kakashi defensively said, keeping his gaze straightforward despite the way (y/n)'s eyes seemed to be burning holes through the side of his head. He didn't want her to catch the redness that was surely peeking out through the top of his mask. He would surely never hear the end of it.

"Did you think I meant 'us' in a romantic sense, Kakashi?" (Y/n) lightly teased once again, her cheeks hurting the slightest from how long she kept grinning. It made her own heart flutter at how flustered the male seemed to be. Though, she was sure it was out of pure embarrassment and not because he held romantic feelings for her. She made sure to ignore the way the thought seemed to bring pain to her heart.

"I've already told you that I don't like you." Kakashi grated out through clenched teeth. He didn't care if his words came out harsh, the words spoken were true. At least he told himself that they were.

(Y/n) just playfully rolled her (e/c) eyes, knowing that furthermore teasing would only agitate the male further. She didn't want him to get so defensive that he would end up leaving all together. "I was just playing around Kakashi. I know that you don't like me like that. I just think that's ironic how we always run into each other. Sort of like fate, you know?"

Kakashi finally turned her head back to (y/n). A single eyebrow raised at the small speech. "You sound like an idiot right now."

"That's just plain rude Kakashi."

"I'm not nice (y/n)."

"I seemed to notice that lately."

(Y/n) blankly stared back at the male. The two sitting in silence as they stared at each other.

Kakashi let out a resigned huff, "What do you mean by fate then?" He made sure that his words came out in an indifferent tone despite how curious he really was. He didn't want (y/n) to get the wrong idea once more.

"I don't know," (Y/n) offhandedly shrugged. "Maybe fate wants us to get closer. Like friends, perhaps?"

Kakashi blinked at her, "You are an idiot."

"Thanks, it's always nice to talk to you." (Y/n) rolled her eyes, but wasn't that offended due to the small grin that appeared on her face. The grin was wiped away once more as a look of seriousness appeared.

"Can I ask you a serious question?" (Y/n) asked, her fingers nervously and rapidly tapping themselves on the top of her thighs. She knew that Kakashi was going to close up and revert back to being a jerk but it was too late to take back her question. Besides, she selfishly wanted to hear his response. She said wanted to get closer to him even if he didn't want that. God, it almost sounded like she liked him.

Kakashi just stared back her. (Y/n) took that as sign to go ahead and ask. Her mouth opened before closing in an uncertainty before gathering the courage to ask the male.

"Why is that whenever I try to get closer to you, you always seem to close off and shy away from me?" (Y/n) hesitantly questioned, her (e/c) eyes watching the way Kakashi suddenly tensed up and fingers clenched down tightly to the rope but made no further move to relax. "Well not exactly shy away because it seems to me that you get super defensive, but still."

"You wouldn't understand." Kakashi slowly exhaled. His demeanor softening just by the slightest, but it was still obvious that he was widely uncomfortable with the topic at hand.

(Y/n)'s eyes widened in surprise. She wasn't expecting for Kakashi to answer back. She wasn't sure what to expect anymore it seemed. Kakashi seemed to be full of unexpected surprises.

"I can try to." (Y/n) softly assured.

"I'm scared," Kakashi wanted to say. "Scared that I'll end up getting too attached to someone, until eventually, that someone ends up leaving me. While it's completely out of my control and fault." He wouldn't and couldn't find a will to urge these words that were on the tip of his tongue out of his mouth.

Kakashi hated how the guilt settled inside his chest and stayed there like a weight due to the way (y/n) visibly showed genuine concern within her eyes. The female sat quietly and patiently waiting for a response that was never going to come from him.

"It's nothing," Kakashi finally muttered. "Drop it."

(Y/n) watched as Kakashi tore his gaze away from her and looked straight ahead towards the children. She wouldn't lie to herself and say she wasn't disappointed at the lack of response, but she couldn't find herself to be mad at Kakashi. She knew it was a personal question to a touchy subject. She was just glad that Kakashi didn't fully pull away.

"Sorry." (Y/n) found herself apologizing. Finally, looking away from Kakashi to scan through the crowd of children to find Naruto. The boy still cheerfully playing with small group of friends.

"It's nothing to apologize about." Kakashi awkwardly waved off. "Let's just forget about it."

"Okay." (Y/n) lightly said with a small grin.

The two sat in a comfortable silence before being startled at the loud outburst coming from a small, blond boy. "Mom, Kakashi, come meet my friends!"

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Wow, it's been awhile since I've updated. It's been so long that I swear I didn't remember how to write. I just kept deleting my drafts. Anyways, I told myself that I was going to update so I forced myself to start writing. So, I know the kids were supposed to be in this chapter but I didn't know how to write them so I decided to focus on (y/n)'s and Kakashi's relationship and progress it faster. I'm not sure if this chapter was up to anyone of your expectations, but I really tried. Please no harsh comments and thank you once more for not spamming my comments with "update". That makes my day. Hopefully another chapter will be posted next week. I think I'm going to get started on it right now after posting this chapter. That way I have a vague idea on what to write.

Anyways, enjoy.