Wayward - [A Destiel AU]

Chapter 4

On the drive home, Cas realised Dean wasn’t even in the wrong. He had blown everything out of proportion, and he hadn’t been completely honest with his friend himself. It was Dean’s business, no matter how much Cas tried to stick his nose in. He only knew it would get bitten off.

Cas hadn’t been totally honest, either. The feelings he was having for Dean were only getting stronger every time he saw him.

It didn’t help that every weekend, they turned up at each other’s doors. When Cas wanted to clear his head and figure out all the mixed signals he was getting from Dean, said friend turned up with a FRIENDS DVD and offered a marathon or just wanted to hang out. But if being this close to each other was going to ruin their friendship, Cas didn’t know what to do. He by no means wanted to change their relationship in any way. If they got closer, then either one of them could get freaked out and back away, but if they spent less time together they would inevitably end up drifting. Cas didn’t think he could stand that.

Dean’s walk proved pointless. Hands stuffed angrily in pockets, he was embarrassed, ashamed and angry – angry at Sam, for starting the whole thing; angry at Cas, for proving Sam right; and angry at himself for having any sort of feelings.

Dean loved his best friend. He was ashamed and embarrassed that Cas had to find out the hard way, especially with his kid brother in the room witnessing the whole thing – and he was upset that even though he loved Cas, all he could do was push him away. Dean didn’t want to admit his feelings but now they were too great. Every brush of skin when their arms touched made his stomach do flips, but every time Cas hugged him like a brother he felt a pang of longing; wishing the hug could have meant as much to Cas as it did to him.

He didn’t want to change anything about their relationship, but Dean had already fucked it up. He fucked it up like he fucked everything else up, and he didn’t know what else he could do.

He got back home to Sam about three hours later, ignoring his brother who tried to beg for forgiveness. He waved him off, letting his apology slide right off his new thick skin that he had built in the past three hours, and told him not to bother him. ‘Leave me alone.’ He grumbled as he slammed the door to his room. He didn’t come back out for the rest of the day.

**

School was awkward. Andy and Michael and the rest of the team could smell the tension between the two friends, but whenever they tried to ask about it Sam would magically appear behind them, muttering something about mustn’t speak about it, falling out, my fault, weekend, don’t ask. The football team was worried about their friends, but decided not to press the issue. They had seen Dean mad before, and didn’t like it. There was no way any of the rest of them wanted to aggravate the vice captain of the team.

Cas was finishing up the cool down exercises with half a dozen members of the team. He couldn’t help but notice that Dean was nowhere to be seen – not just for the cool down, but for the whole practise game. He wondered where he was. Was he avoiding Cas?