-No control-

Chapter 5

*back to previous time (don't get confused by the flashback in chapter 4,this chapter would occur right after chapter 3)*

We finally got back home after the long ride from Harry's grandmothers house.I went to the kitchen to make some lunch for the both of us and he went straight upstairs to his room and shut the door. I Couldn't help but feel bad for him.I could relate because of what happened with my parents but I only lost two people.He just lost four.

He seemed to be getting better after we left their house but I wouldn't be surprised if he broke down again.I don't think anyone can recover that fast.

I decided to make some sandwiches for the both of us.I slathered some peanut butter and jelly into four pieces of bread to made two sandwiches.Then I cut them into triangles like my mom used to when she packed my lunch for me in elementary school.I put the four triangular sandwiches on a plate and started up the stairs towards Harry's room.When I reached the door I put my ear up to it and didn't hear a single sound.Not even the quietest breath or movement.

I lightly touched my knuckle against the wooden door and waited for an answer.

I guessed he was too depressed to talk so I cracked the door open just to see what he was doing.Inside the room I saw him lying in his bed,motionless.i thought he was crying at first but he wasn't.he was just staring into space..he was traumatized.

"Harry" I said so quietly it was basically a whisper.

"What?"

"Are you hungry? I made some sandwiches... We can talk if you want."I said as I slowly started to walk towards the bed he was lying on.

"Okay."he answered after a long pause.He then sat up from the bed and sat on the edge with one leg hanging off.

I handed him the plate of sandwiches and sat across from him on the bed.

"Thanks."he said as he took the plate and grabbed a sandwich.He then handed me the plate back and I took one also. We ate in silent for a few seconds until I decided it was time to speak.

"How are you holding up?"I ask Harry trying to keep eye contact to see how he was really feeling.

He took a long pause and just stared at me.It was like he didn't know how to answer the question and he just froze in time.

After a few seconds he shook himself out of it and took a deep breath while looking down at his sandwich.

"I don't know..."he said finally.
"My whole family is gone except for my mother and I don't think there is much chance she's still alive."he continues.
"I went over there hoping to reunite with my whole family but instead I end up loosing them all without even getting to say goodbye."he sets down his sandwich and reaches into his pocket lulling out a folded price of paper

"All I have is this letter.... And it only MENTIONS my Parents...they had no idea their time in life was up so they didn't get to tell me any last words.My grandparents had to do it for them."He kept ranting on and I stared intensively at his face as he poured his heart out.

"And you know what Emma."he says before taking a deep breath and slapping his leg.

"I'm scared."these were the last words I thought I would every hear Harry say.He's a hero...He saved my life...He didn't seem scared then,so why is he scared now?

His face began to get red and his voice began to break.I could tell he was about to break down during this sudden realization of his true feelings.

"I'm scared,because I thought there was someone out there trying to find me."his hand gestures became more rapid and his mouth began to quiver.
"My parents.They were supposed to find me and they were supposed to help me survive in this place.I mean who am I kidding?I can't do this! I have no idea what the hell im doing half the time.I can't take care of you! I DONT THINK I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF."his voice begins to raise and I'm suddenly afraid to speak against him.

"Why the fuck did i think I could do this."he says while shaking his head and Running his hand through his hair.At this point I'm completely surprised by how much he's opened up to me.

I watch his face as a couple of small tears escape his eyes and he quickly wiped them always.

"Harry...I when I lost my parents I was scared too.I was completely alone.no one to talk to,no one to live with,no one to drive me places.I was completely out of my mind trying to do that on my own...I mean the fist time I left the house I nearly got raped for gods sake!but I'm not alone anymore."

I reached out to grab Harry's large hand. I rubbed it with my thumb as I smiled at him.he smiled back too.

"We have each other to depend on so there's no need to be scared anymore.Were going to be okay,I promise..."

The word "promise" suddenly brought back some horrible memories.

My dad promised he was coming back home and that everything was going to be okay.But look where I am now.I decided to cover up the "promise" by saying...

"I'll try my best to make sure we're okay."

From now on ,I told myself, I'll only say promise if I can really fulfill it for sure because a broken promise leads to a broken heart and I know this from experience.

Harry's hand wrapped around mine and he looked at me and smiled.

"Thank you."

"No problem" I say.

Harry then let go of my hand to grab a sandwich and ask me,"since it's just you and me from now on I think it's time we get to know each other better,"

For the next hour or so we talk about everything.

I told him my name was Emma rose Davis,that my dad used to call me em and I also ended up telling him exactly what happened to my parents.

He ended up telling me his name was Harry Edward styles,that he had gone to college for a short time..almost a year before the government shut down and that he was 19 years old.We talked about plenty of other things till it was dark.We ended up eating some left over beans and soup for dinner then told each other goodnight and went to our separate rooms.

HARRYS POV:

After dinner I couldn't stop thinking about everything that happened today.The whole thing with my parents and that very long conversation I had with Emma really helped me.I wanted to cry but I also wanted to smile.She always seemed to make me happier in the saddest times of my life and I couldn't figure out how.maybe I liked her...I don't know but would that be a good thing?After all we kind of need each other as friends for support.I decided I needed rest after the long day I had.I shut off my light and went to bed.

EMMAS POV:
After dinner I went to my room and grabbed my diary.My mind was still filled with facts of Harry that wouldn't leave my mind.I decided to write them down because I didn't want to forget.I wrote the date at the top of the paper, then I made a bullet point list of all the things I could remember.

•Harry Edward Styles
•19
•Birthday:February 1st
•no family alive
•hero

I don't really know why I wrote that word.He didn't tell me he was a hero but I knew he was stronger and more incredible that he thought he was.The word hero suddenly came to mind so I wrote it down.Its definitely a word that describes him well. I signed my name at the bottom of the paper then shut my book.Then I decided to get some sleep.All I could think about was what a great day me and Harry we're going to have tomorrow.

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