Fall for you

Part 3

When I woke up Michael had left just as I predicted. I turned over to see that he mustn't have left that long ago as the bed was still indented from where he had slept.
Happy fucking birthday to me.
I was so stupid. He would probably never want to see me again. I told him I loved him for Christ sake. It must have been the heat of the moment but then again I really do love him. Well I think I do, I don't actually know what love is or how to love but whatever it was I felt it towards Michael. It wasn't my fault I couldn't stop thinking about the fluffy haired boy who changed his hair colour so often I can't even remember what he looked like with natural hair.
I honestly didn't know what I was going to do now. He was my escape and I fucked it all up. Everything we had, well didn't have but we could of had. It was confusing. Michael was confusing. But I knew that whatever happened now he would never want to talk to me. I promised him so many times I wouldn't develop feelings for him because he told me he didn't want to hurt anybody else. But I betrayed him and me being my messed up self fell for him so quickly. I could have stopped all this hurt months ago and just called the whole thing whatever we did off to spare me the pain of rejection.
But I had wanted him in my life in some way and I didn't care what way as long as I still got to see him and touch him and for a few hours a week pretend he was mine and that he didn't have other girls left, right and centre.
My parents once again didn't even phone to say happy birthday obviously forgetting or just not caring. How could they forget about there daughter like that. It was common decency to at least say happy birthday to the person you have birth to.
I had nothing planned all day and decided to go out tonight and once again try and forget about the world. I wanted to find an easy one night stand and I wanted to get so wasted I wouldn't remember my own name.
I moped around all day feeling worthless and forgotten just like always.
Pulling on my favourite little dress that made me feel good I fished around in my closet to try and find some shoes to match. The dress wasn't slutty but it still made my figure look good. Normally I hated the way I looked but tonight I was satisfied. I looked modest and not like some girl who just wanted a hook up although that's exactly what I wanted.
Nodding to the security guard at my favourite club he let me in with no problem not even having to see my ID to know I was old enough. I guess that's what happens when all you do is spend your life in a club.
Even the bar tender knew me by now and placed my usual double vodka and coke in front of me.
"Rough day?" He asked
"You got it" I mumbled downing the glass in seconds. "4 shots please"
"What are you celebrating?" He asked jokingly.
"My birthday" I grumbled taking him a back.
"Oh..." He said before going to get the shots.
"Hey Y/N" I heard someone say from behind me.
I looked only to see one of Michael's best friends. "Luke" I said in acknowledgement.
"What are you doing here by yourself?" He asked
"Nothing" I replied "you?"
"Just here with the boys want to join us?" He asked politely.
"No it's fine I shouldn't"
"Happy birthday" the bar tender said happily placing the shots In front of me .
"It's your birthday?" Luke asked his eyes wide in shock.
I nodded as I took each shot letting them burn my throat slowly beginning to numb the pain.
"You should come sit with us. No one should be alone on there birthday"
"I said it's fine Luke" I snapped not in the mood.
"I was only trying to be nice. If you want to spend your birthday alone fine. But I offered you company
so you can't sulk about no one wanting to be with you on your birthday." He said
"I'm sorry" I sighed "I appreciate it Luke seriously but I think I should stay out of your lives."
"Don't be stupid. Michael wouldn't want you to stay out of his life" he said sitting next to me.
"I did something stupid and I don't think he will ever forgive me. I promised him something important and I didn't keep that promise." I said quietly.
"Well, if you change your mind we're over there" he said pointing to where All the boys were sitting at a booth.
I nodded smiling as he left ordering another shot before gaining the courage to go over to the boys table I got up to walk over to them only to be dragged away by people dancing in the crowd. A minute later I found myself pressed up against some random guy grinding and dancing this is what I lived for.
Michael's pov.
There she was again. She was everywhere I went it's like someone up there hates me. I didn't want to see her again as I didn't want to remind her of the pain I caused her and how I left her heartbroken and rejected. She was worth more than that and she was worth more than me. She deserves someone who would treat her right someone who can love her back. I don't know how to love and I never want to learn. It's not the way I work. I will never get hurt if I don't fall in love. That was my motto to life. Bad I know. But that's just what I was. Bad.
Of course I felt protective of her. She was the best fuck I've ever had but she was a friend. I don't have any friends who are girls but I counted her as one. She promised me she wouldn't fall in love with me but what did she have to go and do. I told her not to. I told her I would ruin her if she gained feelings for me. I remember leaving her apartment early this morning. I remember placing one last kiss onto her lips knowing I could never do that again as what we had had been majorly fucked up. I had left her peacefully sleeping in her bed, no worries and no pain until she would wake up and realise i wasn't there. But I knew that she knew that i wouldn't be there when she woke up so it wouldn't of been a surprise to wake up to an empty bed.
She looked so sad sitting at the bar. Luke had offered to get the drinks so I didn't have to face her. There she went again, drinking her sorrows away like any other day. She worried me. One day she was going to take something or drink too much and end up getting herself killed. We were both messed up that's why we clicked so easily but I knew I had to set her straight from the beginning. I had to warn her that I didn't love. But obviously she didn't listen.
I could hear Luke inviting her to come sit with us but there conversation turned a tad heated as she snapped at him. His hands went up in defence and she looked defeated. So broken that it made something in my heart twitch but I wouldn't acknowledge it.
He came back over looking deep in thought.
"She's seriously damaged" he said sadly as if one simple conversation had affected him badly "I want to help her. But she won't let anyone in" he sighed
I knew Luke had liked her when I first brought her to our flat she had been locked out of her house and had no where to go and it was raining so she called me and I took her round to the boys where she sat and played Xbox with them. They got on with her well and soon became friends with her. I knew we were her only friends she probably didn't even call us her friends she was too guarded.
"She's spending her birthday alone. No one should do that" he mumbled still running on about her.
"Wait... It's her birthday today?" I asked shocked feeling guilty.
"Yep, it's sad that she wouldn't come and join us. She said she didn't want to be a burden and that she should stay out of our lives"
"Oh..." I said pretending to not be that interested. I felt like shit. It was obvious that nobody knew it was her birthday. She said her parents were out of town for the week which means that they obviously forgot about it and probably hadn't even called to wish her a happy birthday.
After 10 minutes of just intently watching her dance I had enough and went to the bar ordering a bottle of champagne and saying goodbye to the boys. Grabbing her hand roughly and pulling her from the dance floor and out into the cold night I wordlessly dragged her all the way to my flat.
"M-Michael w-what are you doing?" She asked quietly.
I still didn't say anything and pulled her up the stairs and into the bed room. Pushing her onto the bed I pulled out two ropes from the bed side table quickly stripping her of all her clothes and tying each arm to the bed posts. She struggled to move her hands as I chuckled at her.
"W-what are you doing?" She asked again worriedly.
"Don't worry, you're safe just enjoy this." I said huskily as I was turned on at the sight of her spread out naked on my bed. I never thought I'd get the chance to do this again.
"But what about yesterday?" She asked
"One more night, that's all I'm asking, I'm not fully ready to say good bye, please just let me do this then we don't have to hurt each other again"
She nodded for the go ahead and I hovered over her to kiss her lightly but it became intense and rough quickly. Leaning over to grab the bottle of of champagne I brought earlier. Popping the top off the bottle I brought it to my lips taking a sip before beginning to pour it over her naked body in small puddles placing the bottle onto the bed side table I began to leave a trail of open mouthed kisses along her skin sucking and licking at the patches where the champagne was. It was cold in contrast with her hot skin but it was coming her down as goose bumps started appearing over her arms and legs. I carried along the path of her stomach and in between her breast the taste of the champagne mixing with the taste of her salty skin. Reaching her hip bones I placed small kissing and nips down her thighs and up again repeating this until half the bottle was gone and she was a squirming mess below me I spread her legs further apart burying my face In
between her legs and properly tasting her.
"So sweet" I breathed against her heat.
She moaned as she pulled against her restraints.
"Michael... Please I need you so bad" she groaned sexily making me rush to strip off my boxers. Teasing her entrance with the head of my hardened length I slowly pushed into her. I didn't just want this to be a quick fuck. But I didn't want her to think I was making love to her because I wasn't I don't know what it was but it wasn't just meaningless sex. I just wanted to show that somebody cared.
"Fuck, Mike... Move" she growled
Crap I thought. I wasn't going to last long, but I had to. I couldn't come before her. Reaching my hand down to rub her clit to help her get there faster.
"Michael, please slow down" she cried
Obeying her I slowed my movements removing my hand and making my thrust slower but deeper hitting into her at a new angle making her moan breathily panting and gasping for breath.
"I'm going to- oh god" she shouted clenching her eyes shut as her body uncontrollably shook with pleasure.
"Fuck" I mumbled biting into her shoulder as I came minutes after. Pulling out and catching my breath beside her.
"I have to get back to the boys now" I said pulling my clothes on quickly wanting to get away from the awkwardness that had fallen over us.
"Oh okay" she said sadly. I untied her hand from the head board as they dropped to her sides.
"You can see your self out" I said about to leave the room before I remembered something. Turning back to where she was now sitting on the edge of the bed I walked over to her lifting her head up and acing a small kiss on her lips.
"Happy birthday" I whispered seeing her look confused but her features soon twisted into a small smile of thanks before I left her.
Just like I always did but this time it was for good. I couldn't hurt her any more. We had to go our separate ways. She needs to find someone who can give her the love I'll never be able to and I'll find some other girls to mess about and have meaningless sex with.