Finding You | Haesoo

What Is Love?

"Jisoo, you're basically at an age where you should be dating. Why aren't you?"

"I already told you I would if I ever fall in love. The problem is I just don't feel anything for anyone, okay?"

I'm Jisoo, your everyday average college girl. I've got 'not-so-bad' grades and a couple of friends I'd go out and have fun with. I practically eat, play, study, and get zits every now and then just like all the other girls in my college dorm. Only one thing sets me apart from them, I've never dated or had a crush on anyone EVER. 'Stonecold' that's what they call me. I mean, is it suppose to be my fault that I never had feelings for anyone? Do I really look that heartless? I've watched countless rom-com movies and took note of everything one was suppose to feel if they were 'in-love' - the popping of the foot, the butterflies in the stomach, and even the slow motion or fast forward feeling you get when you finally find 'the One.' Yes, I took note but I've encountered none of these feelings.

Don't get me wrong. I've had a couple of guys approach me and you can call me judgemental but I just know from first glance that it's not going to work out. I think it's better to let them know then and there rather than wasting their time, which is how the whole 'stonecold' nickname was created. Now every guy in our university believes that I'm some wicked witch who heartlessly rejects and embarrasses men. No one has approached me since.

It's honestly frustrating. I do want to fall in love. I do want to be swept off my feet but I just haven't found that special person to share the feeling with. I told my halmeoni about this built-in frustration of mine. It's like I'm not fully human. My halmeoni, however, keeps reminding me that everything appears and happens at the right time. I'm grateful for her and her ability to alway remind me to be patient. She might be right. Maybe all this frustration comes from social pressure. I just got to deal with this.

I took a sip of my cola and got ready for my next class with Lisa. We've been bestfriends for years and she basically knows everything there is to know about me. She's also the #1 person pressuring me to go out and date.

" We aren't young forever you know? If you keep on waiting for the 'right time,' you might just wake up one day and realize you've ran out of fishes to fish," teased Lisa.

" You do know we have a Math test today, right? My dating life is the least of my concerns right now. I wouldn't want to retake this subject."

"I'm just saying. Come on. The girls and I are going on a group blind date this weekend. You should come. Just one date.. and don't be so judgemental. Give those men a chance. You'll never know. The love of your life could be there."

"I'll think about it."

The bell rings and our professor steps into the room with our test papers. Is that a 3 pager exam?? Good luck to us.