Capital Letters Of Wild Heaven (ONC 2022)

CHAPTER 05

Marcelli Eirene Banasiewiez

"Oren?" I called him.

I was welcomed by silence as I went down to the first floor.  I looked for him the moment I realized it was empty here.  I even searched inside the aparador in case he hid himself to mess with me.  But he's nowhere.

That's when I noticed the drawer of my bedside table slightly tilted. And that's when I realized he took his phone with him when I didn't find it from where I placed it.

Oren Fucking Blair.

I immediately looked for the folder with Oren's information. I was about to add his number to my contacts but instead I saw my ex-boyfriend's number.

I only felt disgust and regret for the years I've been with him. Then I realized that I forgot about him for how many hours. Like he didn't cross my mind for milliseconds.

Maybe, Oren is a blessing in disguise.  If not for him, I might still be devastated now.  I mean, I just lost an almost ten-year-old relationship and I love the man.  I have all the rights to cry but I didn't— Yes, I did but only before Oren came to annoy the hell out of me.

Deleting his number didn't even cross my mind.  Because I totally forgot about him.  Oren invaded my mind like a wildfire and my attention focused on him and only him.

But now that I was alone, thoughts about that day came back.  A series of what-ifs again.

What if I stayed at home? What if I wait for him to open the door so it will give him time to hide the girl? What if I give him a chance to explain?

The only answer would be: he'll keep banging women and keep on cheating on me.

I'm aware that we barely make time because of our field of work.  And why, oh, why I never notice the changes a man does when they're doing something behind your back?

The cancellation of plans, plain and cold texts, only quick calls, no I love yous and goodnight, attention always on the phone…

I do still love him despite those things.  All those years wouldn't be erased by just a couple of days.  I even regret going that night.

The thing is if we love, we're scared to lose it.  We're scared to waste time and memories and the sole reason we try not to give up.  That's why others ended up being martyrs because to lose someone you love is like failing a test you invest so much time reviewing but still get a low score.

And I don't want that.  I don't want to hold on.  Love isn't it all in a relationship. Cake had a lot of ingredients to make it tasteful.

The sound from the cuckoo clock on the wall startled me.  It's now afternoon and Oren is somewhere out there.  I sighed and with eyes closed, I deleted his number then proceeded to call Oren.

I calm myself down while dialing.  It only takes a second for him to answer. 

"Where the hell are you?" I asked as soon as he picked up the phone. "And why the hell did you bring your phone? You know you're not allowed to even hold that!"

I heard a random sound and I assume he was in the town.  Voices and horn sounds.  I can even hear a man yelling Taho.

"Ahm… I don't know… and ahm, I don't know how to contact you so I just bring my phone." Oren whispered.

My blood immediately went to my head.  I stand to walk back and forth.  This is the very reason why my fresh breakup was forgotten.

The only thing I understand from what he said is he doesn't know where he is.