I found God, through one of my favorite things - music.
I remember the day well. It was around 6 PM, and I was sitting in my bed, doing what I always would do, which was watch YouTube videos on my outdated but working 2nd generation IPod touch. I'm only 11 at the time, so I didn't have much to worry about, which led me to spending much of my time on YouTube, browsing through videos.
At the current point in time, I was somewhat obsessed with a sport known as parkour, where the goal is to attempt to get from one point to another as quickly and as stylishly as possible. One video I was watching was a video called, 6 Year Old Parkour-Keagan Gransbury (who by the way, is a very talented kid). It had some awesome background music, and I was determined to figure out what it was.
Because I was on an IPod, it didn't tell me what the music was, so I listened to it a couple more times, and then searched what I thought some of the lyrics from the chorus were. I searched "It's too late, it's my fate, I can't turn around," When none of the results matched the song, I tried something different. I searched what he had seemed to be saying a lot. I searched "No turning back, no other path," Once again, no results that matched what I was hearing in the video.
I tried one more time. I searched something more simple. "no plan b" I saw the same results as before, but I decided I may as well listen to this song, that was repeatedly coming up no matter what I searched.
About fifteen seconds in, I started hearing what I was looking for. Turns out the video creator had cut out the song intro in the video, and I had been listening to the right song the whole time. The song was called "No Plan B" and the artist was Manafest. This song rocked.
I began browsing through some of his other music. It all was awesome. Some softer, some more hard rock, and some rap. He had a nice mix, and I kept noticing this other guy named Trevor Mcnevan, who had a pretty sweet voice, in his songs.
I'm not exactly sure when I found out that he was Christian. I know it wasn't right away, thats one thing I know. It might have been when I first heard "Never Let You Go", or it could've been when I watched his ThisIsMeTv interview. Immediately after I found out, though, Christianity became an serious interest.
It started out as a 'monkey see, monkey do' type of thing. I admired Chris, (Manafest), so I was reading the bible, and learning about faith. Quickly though, I started to see that this actually was real. I had that kind of 'what the crap, this is legit' moment.
You see, my parents weren't Christian. My dad was agnostic (doesn't know what he believes), and my mom was that kind of 'talk to the universe' person. She likes herbal medicines, and believes that those little rocks you put around your bed actually ward off evil spirits. Her version of God is the universe, and her version of satan, well, she calls it her 'ego'. I think it's really really weird.
On top of that, my mom was raised Catholic. She spent many years of my life telling me that Catholic 'leaders' are total jerkfaces, which is why when she turned 18, she stopped going to church all togehter. So when I held my mothers opinion on Catholicism, all religion went into the same category. Stupid. Pointless. Fake. Mean. I had mistakenly added these traits to Christianity as well as Catholicism. That is what made it so difficult for me to see.
When I was about 9 to 11 years old, I was a jerk. I was mean, and nasty to both of my parents. I was constantly ticked at at least one of them, and was just downright miserable, which is why I was doing what I was doing, sitting alone in my room, watching YouTube, instead of spending time with my family. I also hung out with a lot of guys. They cursed all the time, and taught me that it's okay to break the rules. I listened to Green Day too, which is America's revolutionary punk band. These guys drank, smoked, and around the time when they were first getting popular, smoked a lot of pot. Not very good role models, you think?
I didn't really notice the change at first. All I really saw was that I was getting yelled at less. I thought it was strange, until I stepped back, and took a look at then compared to now. I was nice, didn't cause fights, didn't curse nearly as much, (though is is still a habit I am trying to break), and was in general, a much happier person.
God's grace had gotten ahold of me, and it had shaken me to my senses. Made me realize so much in such a short time. Made me see why you shouldn't fight, why you should love everyone around you, and why you should always listen to Him, because He knows best.
Some days I can feel myself stumbling. I'll wake up angry, for some reason I don't know. I'll get angry at my friend, treat a teacher with disrespect, give no effort in school, not do my homework, use cursing as a normal part of my language, and get in a fight with my mom. But I''ll get up the next day, and go again, asking for forgiveness, and help to overcome the bad habits I have developed over the years.
So I don't k quite understand everything, I don't know all the stories, and I'm not as knowledgeable as a kid raised in a church, because lets be honest, It hasn't been that long - maybe 8 months total, 5 or so where I was just getting to know God, and feeling awful about the life I had previously led. But hey - I'll learn more, and keep growing my relationship with Him. After all, it' only up from here.
XD
