Reality hurts. Truth hurts. But of course anong magagawa natin kung di tanggapin ito at magmove on. One lesson that I learned in loving: ACCEPT THE BITTERNESS OF REALITY AND DON'T BE STUPID AGAIN.
I'm Rochelle and bet what I'm naïve and innocent. Malay ko ba jan sa pagmamahal mahal nayan. Malay ko ba sa katotohanan. All I know is I've been such stupid for loving and trusting him. It all started here.
December 28, 2012.
Puteekkkk. Anong isusuot ko??O__O hmmm. Ngayon ung party na pinaghandaan naming PYGA officers, isang Christmas celebration para sa baranggay naming.:)) meydo hasstle sa schedule pero I know all of this will be worth it.
"Rochelleeeee!! Bilisan mo dyan! Ayna! Magaayos pa kayo duon, paganda ka ng paganda eh anjan na ung mga kasama mo."
=___= ehhh. KJ lang? kinuha ko na ung pants ,sandals and a see through shirt at nagmadaling nagbihis.
? as usual sa unang program eh party for ugugaw so lahat kaming officers nagassist. Ahh! Luckily nakuha akong officer kahit na wala ako nung election. Astig noh?XDD lahat ng officer kababata ko:3 sa iisang lugar lang kami eh kaya comfortable kami pero we don't talk much malalaki na kasi kami (dalaga kuno) haha.
Dito nagbago ang buhay ko.....
"Akoy alipin mo kahit hindi batid
aaminin ko minsan akoy manhid
sana ya iyong naririnig
sa iyong yakap akoy nasasabik~~"
ugh. Sweet dance po nagyon ang pinapatugtog nila at ang nakakainis alam kong hindi niya ako isasayaw. But I'm hoping.:)
yung tinutukoy ko si Kuya jaji. Hihi X"D siya ung guitarist naming, kababata ko na rin pero ngayon ko lang siya napansin. He's so cool and handsome kaya napatulala ako nung nakita kong papalapit siya sa akin *U*
"~ Sayaw tayo?:3" then he offered his hands
Gusto kong tumili nun. Woaaaa. My dream! Haha. Chos.XD
I looked at him with disbelief "Ako??"o_O sabay turo sa sarili ko.
Haha. Oh ako na yung hindi makapaniwala.ISINAYAWWWW NIYA AKO.WHAHAHAHA
The first time we danced, the first time I held his hand parang may butterflies sa stomach ko and may kabayo sa puso ko. Damn.. he's so hot. Yeah. Literally hot. Patang aura niya na nga un eh but he is damn cool. I think I'm falling.haha Kung pwede lang tong iuwi sa bahay.X//D
I can still remember the first phrase that he said to me while we were dancing...
"Child Abuse.haha"
Oh diba? Sweet lol. Napasmile ako dun kasi ang tangkad niya and he's like 18 pero I was shocked to know na he's only 16! And I'm only pipten:D wahahaha. Bagay kami*UU*
Halos hindi ako nakatulog ng gabing yun. Medaling araw pala. XDD haayy. Nagulantang nanaman ako na makakita ng friend request (Jay R Kelly) then I saw his hot DP. TwT yummy. Chos.haha halos mapatili ako dahil sa sobrang tuwa ko nun. Then nung minsang nakachat ko siya he asked for my number!:D
Un. Hindi ko na napigilan at sumigaw na talaga ako. para man akong tanga nun sa computer shop wala akong pakialam. :P hiningi niya ang number ko.whahaha I'll surely flirt with him XDD
Then un (pwedeng fast forward na?) XDD we became text mate. Ang tawag ko sa kanya eh "Garlic". Haha ksi ganto yunnn.hmmmm
Gabi nung kinuha niya ung number ko, napanaginipan ko siya. *U* naging kami DAW at ang tawag ko sa kanya Garlic. Hoho
:D wahahha. But I haven't told him yet that. I was planning sana pag naging kami na.
YES, KAMI. SIYA AT AKO
Kasi after weeks sinabi niya kung pwede niya akong ligawan.^^ Of course pumawag ang lola, crush ko eh. Haha ang landi lang X"D
The date..
Oh. May date kami.haha we went to Manaoag church *U* and nung "Our father~" na song the time na kelangan maghawak kamay, hinawakan niya yung kamay ko.:) haha kilig ako nun ehXDD the nilibot naming yung buong church then kumain.
Kaya kami nag date. Kasi..
"Yung regalo ko?:3"
"eh?? Tapos na ang Christmas noh.":PP
"kahit na... hmmmmm. :3"
"haha. Adik. Gusto mo ng bato??XDD wala akong pera kuya.hahaha"
"eh? Bato talaga?haha pdeng kiss nalang?:3"
"Woaaa. Kiss your face:PP hmmm.alam ko na!"
"bitter. Haist. Oh ano?"
"bibigyan kita ng bato? exchange rocks tayo:D"
Weird man. Pero nakisakay siya sa trip ko? kaya kami may date ngayon because of that rock. Ngayon kasi kami nageexchange rock eh.hehe
Marami pa kaming pinuntahan at pinasyalan. Naalala ko pa nga, we went to theater at nanuod ng Sisterakas nag World of Fun, then videoke..hmmm. kung saan niya ako kinantahan... ?
It was so fun being with him. kaya medyo napadalas yung pagkikita namin. I always attend 2nd mass in church para lang makiat siyang magguitar. Kasi he's serving in church as guitarist in choir. Yun lumipas ang ilang linggo. Malapit na ang Valentines and I'm expecting na he's gonna give me something. Pero hindi na kami umabot duon.
I don't know... after his birthday, feb. 5,When he turned 17 hindi niya na ako tinext. I was a bit disappointed kasi ni smiley wala akong natanggap na text niya...
Yun nalang isang araw nalaman ko. Ngayong ARAW MISMO (FEB. 09, 2013) na nakikipagbalikan na siya as EX niya. Si Ate Guizie, napagusapan na naming ito dati na kung bumalik man sakanya si ate Guizie hindi na sila magkakabalikan pa. pero ngayoonn. Super sakit.yung umasa ka tapos WALA. Ako na tatanga tanga naniwala sa sa promises niya.. naniwala sa kalokohan niya. It was a shit that I sacrifice effort for him. Nag aral akong mag guitar for his birthday at I made I video for him pero I was wrong to give effort. Nagaway pa nga kami ng bestfriend ko kasi the time na nagaaral akong mag guitar she has a problem at hindi ko man lang siya napansin....
I am really wrong that I gave my trust in him. I was wrong to love him. And bukas (feb. 10,2013 ) maguusap kami. Sana may patunguhan ang paguusap namin.
I was so stupid to believe in him, to believe in his lies.
It was so fucking damn...
But the only choice I have is to absorb the truth and move on or to continue being martyr and stupid.
