You know how in the beginning of life everything is so simple. From what you haven't experienced or felt.
How you find the little things fun and exciting, such as getting a new toy.
Or when you get older and find a friend that you know who will be there for you through thick and thin.
The feeling of being safe and happy. No worries to care for.
Never the thought of what might happen the next day or even a week from then.
That this world was the brightest thing ever, as the stars stair down at you in the night sky.
To laugh at all the little things with your best friend at 3 AM.
To hug your parents and beg for a little toy you want.
Not to wake up in the middle of the night with a pain in your chest.
Clinching to your teddy bear as you screem for your mommy, barley able to breathe.
While tears of pain stream down your pale face.
Mommy running into the room worried about whats wrong.
Her picking you up and yelling at daddy to start the car as she runs down the stairs.
When the pain almost becomes to much as your being carried.
Or the look on your mothers face when she sees how much pain your in.
You can never forget that look.
A life that started out so normal, so great.
With love, laughter, and pease.
Not hatred, pain, and sickness.
I'm Ella, the 16 year old girl with Lung and heart cancer.
The one girl who has two diseases since she was 10.
Got heart cancer when I was eight but caught lung when I was 10.
Memory was the whole thing that hurt.
Like how happy and healthy felt, making people happy. Not giving them pain.
Every day I hear mom crying in the hallway of the hospital at 2 AM. And her praying that things will get better
Sorry to break it to you mom, but you can't lie to yourself.
The hospital has been my home ever since that night. I do online school of course.
But its lonely.
There was once, just once. When I met a boy.
~~~~~~~~~~~
I smiled brightly at my only fun in this hospital.
"Ella, can I see your teddy bear?" He asked nicely.
I starred at the bear in my arms. Could I trust him? Or course I can.
I nodded before placing the bear in his hand.
He smiled.
" Thank you Ella."
"Your welcome Alexander. " I weakly said with the tube buzzing in my nose.
Alexander Frowned before looking at the door.
"Whats wrong Alexander?" I asked curious of why he was so down all of a sudden.
"Ella, close your eyes. I want to give you something."
I nodded my head before slipping my hands over my eyes.
I could hear Alexander fiddling with something before he placed a thing that felt like a box in middle of my legs.
"Open up now."
I open my eyes to find a little box in front of me
"What is it?"
"Open it up and see Ella." Alexander said with the bear still in his arms.
I nodded as my weak hands lift the top of the box up.
I gasp when seeing the little necklace in the cute little white box.
I take out the golden necklace with the small heart on it.
"Its to show I'll never forget you, and you'll never be able to forget me. I love you Ella."
I almost cried.
"I love you too Alexander."
~~~~~~
I fiddled with the necklace as I sit up.
Alexander left a few years back when his parents were transferred to a different hospital.
He wouldn't dare warm another girls heart right?
I sit up as I fit my oxegen.
Then it happened.
My head spinned as my chest felt like it was tearing apart.
You never see how sick the world is tell your old enough.
You shouldn't be so young to feel such pain.
I should have felt that feeling of high school and a kiss from a boy.
Not stumbling out my door as I try my best to run away.
Run away from the pain, but the tears and screems fill my reality.
"Ma'am, ma'am!" the doctor screems at me as I fall to the floor.
Being thrown onto the bed as they put me to sleep.
Never waking up from it.
When your mother gets to the news.
As she screams at the doctors with a tear stained face.
As your father holds her back as best as He could.
When it all falls apart more then It ever has.
