What Sarah Said // SSoHawk

// what sarah said - death cab for cutie //

And it came to me then, that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time,

Seamus O'Doherty was a boy that was very easy to fall in love with, if I'm to be honest with myself.

I met him at a park, through a few mutual friends, and knew even way back then that there was something mesmerizing about him.

Was it his eyes? Was it his hair? I can't say for sure, but if you had met him the way I had, you would have felt his charm too.

He was funny and clever and always knew what to say to everyone nearby.

I, on the other hand, was a stuttering mess who stumbled and blushed every few sentences, speaking so quietly he had to strain his ears so he could hear me correctly.

He just smiled and answered sweetly to whatever dumb question I had asked him. He was like that. Smooth and relaxed, but still laughable and sweet all at the same time.

After a while of us both chatting at parties our friends invited us to together, we became friends very quickly.

He made me feel a little less lonely and uncomfortable all the damn time and I was a shoulder to lean on when he was shitface drunk with nowhere to go.

I never really believed in any overlord or afterlife, but believe me, when I say we were a match made in heaven, I mean it.

It was great. He could make any shitty situation immensely better just by being near me.

Until it happened.

As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409

He made me fall in love with him too.

My heart always felt fluttery near him, and I'd always catch my eyes leaning towards him when he was near.

On New Years Day, we were watching the fireworks together in awe, when he grabbed my hand.

I used to swear that was the fastest my heart had ever beat in my entire life.

I was wrong.

He asked me out that same night. He had confessed that after knowing me for a while he had started to develop feelings towards me as well.

And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today

Of course, I immediately said yes to dating him, and we soon become closer and more affectionate than ever.

He was everything I had ever wanted in my life.

He was different from the other people I had dated in my life.

He was serious and clever at all the right times, that's something you don't see often in people. I like that.

He taught me that you're never as alone as you feel.

Now I truly am alone, aren't I?

As each descending peak on the LCD took you a little farther away from me

On October 23rd, 2014, we decided we wanted to see a movie together.

We planned on driving out to the nearest movie theater.

We didn't make it that far before it happened.

The traffic lights blared. At first it was too bright to see anything, but things became darker and darker soon after the brightness.

The glass shattered against our skin, piercing into our faces and drawing blood.

I could hear the crack of bones against the car door faintly, through all the noise of the car.