Passion

َََAt the funeral

Valerya,

Sarah: " I know you're strong, everything going to be ok trust me".

Me :" I can't focus on anything I just want to take a nap in my room to wake up with nothing happened.I need to understand, to make a pause, life has to stop for a second but nothing stopped.I'm confused, worry, sad, angry.. messed up ."

Sarah : " hey! Take a cigarette it will helps for a moment to relax, I'm going to see who's knocking the door".

I dropped smoking 4 months ago, yeah it's 4 months since I saw her .I took the cigarette and closed my eyes trying to look for a clue of what happed in my memories.The only thing that come to my vision is an ordinary day of my life a year ago.

(One year ago) 

I can't wait to see him and these terrible boring lessons didn't finish yet! The same shit the same blabla that never end; I choose to specialized in IT but I'm bored , I'm just good at it not passionate about it.

(The bell is ringing)

Yeah whatever, I'm going to see him, the love of my life Prad.

Me: my soul I miss you so much, how was your trip?

Prad: good nothing special. I miss so much my love .

We kissed and went to a nice restaurant to chat a little bit before he goes to his family home.The short time that I spend with him it makes me feel.. alive yeah as that simple it makes me feel that there is someone on this planet that cares for me someone who loves me for who I'm.

It seems like an ordinary love story but it was my life it was the only way or space for me to live for free with my feeling with no filter...

I closed to smile when Sarah just come and said:" hey, go to the balcony I think you should."

Me :" really I can't and I don't want to see anyone right now"

Sarah: " even Veronica!? ."