Authentic Self

Ticking Heart

'tick'  'tick'  'tick' 

The sound of constant ticking resonated my ears.

Where is that sound coming from? I thought to myself, a self reminder that anytime I hear a ticking sound, I know for sure that something startling will happen eventually.  

Oh and it did happen, right as I realized what was about to happen, standing in front of me were huge tall dark wooden two double doors welcoming me with cold and a chilling atmosphere.

Then a sudden song played with vigorous and a fast pace rhythm echoed through the dim-lit hallway, as I entered my so-called humble home, I followed where that song was coming from and I knew it was in our family's wide living room. I saw from a-far, my older sister, Bae Seon, playing the petite grand piano.

"Piano Sonata No. 21 in C Major, Op. 53, "Waldstein": L Allegro con brio"

A sudden voice behind me promptly said. An old lady reaching the height of my shoulders said behind me.

It was the caretaker of our house, we call her Jang-mi sungmo. She took care and raised us, Seon and ur younger brother, Bae Suho, alongside our parents. Our parents may be busy and they did employ Jang-mi sungmo to be our nanny and caretaker but that doesn't mean our relationship with our parents were strained. 

Ah, they had a fight didn't they. I thought to myself.

Just as I was thinking the exact obvious thing, Jang-mi sungmo said next to me, "they had a fight, your sister and your brother were in a serious fight." She halted for a moment and then looked at me again with a worried look.

Whenever my sister was in a bad mood, she would stride herself to our living room and immediately sat on the piano stool and played any song with a fast-paced rhythm, and her all-time favorite was the song playing right now. 

"What exactly happened?"

"Suho was out late again, 'playing around' that's what your sister likes to say. She was telling Suho why he shouldn't be doing what ever he is doing and then he suddenly raised his voice to Seon, and that is when they had an explosive argument."

Huh, my brother with his fiery temper and my sister who's quite controlling to the maknae . . . not even surprising. This does not happen often, but when it does, this very house can turn into a battle scene where nothing was left behind, only sounds of screams and shouts of two soldiers from the opposing sides with vulgar and offensive languages could be heard.

"Where is Suho?"

"He left the house and I don't know where he is now."

"hmmm"

As I kept thinking and wondering where might Suho be, the sound of the piano playing kept getting enormous and a sudden, "BANG!" was heard. Me and Jang-mi sungmo looked back and saw Seon ending her 'victorious piece' at an end and leaving the piano with an unreadable face. She walked upstairs to her room and shut the door ever so quietly.

"Well . . . I'll be in charge of finding Suho and you can take care of Seon, just give her any refreshments or anything to calm her nerves."

As I said that, I immediately turned my phone on, opened contacts and clicked the name 'Suho'.

The sound of my phone ringing with the ringtone 'cascade' filled the living room. But nothing, no one answered my call. I knew when Suho does not answer his phone, either he's sleeping, charging his phone, taking a shit, or just plainly ignoring as he should.

Who could blame him? When someone's mad or just had an argument, they do not have an urge or a sudden response to anyone calling them that is related to the matter.