The Victim

22| what if

S E R I N E

My jaw is slightly ajar, as I stare at Levine in shock.

Her brother was coming to visit? His timing couldn't have been worse. "Took the words right out my mouth," She mutters and I soon realized I had said that out loud. I don't say anything and just run my fingers through my curls.

"Honestly, how do you feel?" I ask. "Truth be told," She looks at me. "like crap. Every thing was going perfectly fine up until now. Me being locked up in jail was like a sign, a sign of more bad things coming my way,"

"Amen."

"May I join?" I look up to see the brunette, Nina. "Sure,"

"I guess everyone's having a bad day?"

"What do you mean by everyone? What happened to you?" I look at her. "Well you guys don't even have to say, I can easily tell. I had a little encounter with Amber, David came late and got detention. Darek was sent to the principals office and Angelo got into a little fight," My brows come together. "What?"

"W- what? why? when?"

"I'm not quite sure but I heard and I saw him fuming,"  I frown, thinking about it for a second.

Alexander.

"I gotta go," I get up from my seat, exiting the cafeteria. It was only now that I had noticed the guys hadn't come to lunch. And all that Nina said, made sense. Maybe that was the reason but it was unlike Angelo to be easily provoked. I needed to see him.

***

L E V I N E

"How's my favorite girl doing?" A breaths fans my ear as arms wrap around me. A kiss is planted on my cheek but I don't budge.

David notices this and pulls his brows together. "What's wrong?"

"Everything," I put an emphasis on the word. He looks at me, worried. He then takes a seat, not taking his eyes off me as he takes my hand in his. I can already sense the concern. "But I don't want to talk about it right now," I spot something in his eyes. Something I didn't expect, hurt.

He masks it up so quickly that I could've sworn I imagined it.

I didn't want to hurt him, but at the same time I didn't want to tell him. Eventually I would, just  not now. I hadn't been the greatest person the past few days but I tried. I really did. I just couldn't take it anymore and once that happened- I closed off. I closed off completely.

I couldn't bring myself to telling him.

It hurt just thinking about it.

It would only bring up the painful past and I didn't want to see how he'd react to it. I didn't want anything to ruin this, but it seemed like I already did. I hated thinking about what happened just a few years. I don't even know if he was fully healed or not.

Either way, the pain never goes away. I was basically an accomplice. I knew everything and I had said nothing.

I hurt him.

More than once.

What If I hurt him again and he never forgives me?

What If?

***

S E R I N E

My hands are shaking and I'm restless. Corridor after corridor, Angelo is nowhere to be found.

Where are you?

As if he could answer me. As if it was just that easy. My chest tightens and I don't know why I feel this way.

Why so much pain?

Why so much hurt?

What If I don't find him - no. You will. You will Serine, stop talking nonsense.

Though it feels like there's more to it than just finding him. It's finding him then knowing why he was like that. Why he was so angry? Why did he get into a fight?

My heart beats even faster and I find myself struggling to breath.

I messed up.

A thousand times in 20 years.

Why do I keep making mistakes? Why can't I just live happily? Why do I do things that hurt others? Will I ever do anything right?

What If he knows?

What If his already long gone and doesn't even want me by his side. "Angelo," I choke out. "I'm sorry," I whisper to absolutely no one.

I place my hand onto my burning chest.

Why can't I ever do anything right?

Why does there always have to be pain? The one that lives in me, like I was born with it.

I hear footsteps, they become louder and louder by the second but I don't look up. I'm too zoned out to do anything. There's no energy in me as I already sat down on the last three steps. "Serine?" The voice sounds familiar but I ignore it.

In this moment I don't care.

"Hey, are you okay?" I recognize the voice. It belongs to a blonde who hates my guts and I hate theirs.  "You look weak, what's the matter? Should I walk you to the Sick Bay?"

I nearly chuckle. "You suddenly care, why?" My question comes out weak. I was genuinely confused on why she was here, speaking to me and sounding... worried.

Yeah, Kelly Anderson, worried.

She rubs both her palms together. She looks at me right in the eyes, and I fail to believe the sincerity in her blue eyes. There's a look of guilt that surprises me.

"Look, I don't like you and you don't like me,"  she begins. "but that doesn't mean I want to see you dead. No matter how many times I've said it, I never meant it from the bottom of my heart. I'm not saying let's be friends, no. I just want to help. I understand if you don't believe me, I wouldn't believe me too. And- believe it or not, I'm worried about Angelo,"

The next words she says, shock me. "Don't hurt him,"

"Why would you be worried?" I furrow my brows. She purses her lips and tears her gaze away from me. "Lets get you to the Sick Bay,"

Before I could even think about it, I feel like everything around me is getting too much and all I see is black.

~~~~

Should I submit my book to Wattys?
What do u guys think?