more than gold, jj maybank

The Bonfire

"A great man once said that if you're born poor, that's not your fault, but if you die poor, well that's on you." My father pauses. "I think in the end it was my fear of going back, of losing everything I have. It made me lose sight of everything I am... Everything I wanted to be. I killed Big John Routledge. I murdered sheriff Peterkin. I shot Gavin Barnstead. I know there's nothing I can do to ease the pain I've caused. Many will say I took the easy way out. But I leave this world with the terrible pain of knowing that I leave behind my family, shattered by grief, broken by my sins. I don't expect you to forgive me for leaving you this way. I just pray that you understand... I can't go on ruining your lives anymore. This has to end. To all of you, I leave my estate, uh, to be divided equally, and I leave a love deeper than I could ever express. Take care of each other." The recording ends, leaving all of us in tears.

I sniff as we all sit in silence, all of us crying and staring at the now blank screen with tears in our eyes. My hand continues to rub Wheezies back as she grabs her glasses from her red and puffy face.

She must feel so confused about everything. Having her sister die on her, then come back to life, then have her brother arrested for murder and her father blown up all in the same month has got to confuse her. She stands up, being the first to move out of all of us. She then walks out of the room, not saying a word.

I watch her as she leaves, the tears on my face and in my eyes, multiplying as Sarah slams the laptop shut with an angry glare.

I look at her and then to Rose before standing up and walking out of the room, still crying quietly as I enter my room and fall on my bed.

✵

"Jade." I hear Rafe say, walking in to my room.

"What? What do you want?" I ask, standing up and turning to glare at him.

"We, uh, we need to talk." He says, closing the door.

"We need to talk?" I scoff, going to leave the room.

"No, Jade! Wait!" He says, grabbing my wrist.

"Don't touch me!" I scream, pulling my wrist from his grip. "Do not come near me Rafe!"

"I know. I know, Jade." He says, backing away.

"You tried to get me killed." I say, looking at him with exhausted eyes.

"I'm sorry. Ok, I did it for dad." He says.

"Look where that got him." I say bluntly, crossing my arms across my chest.

"it's just us now. We need to take care of Sarah and Wheezie, Jade." He says.

"You tried to kill Sarah, Rafe. That is not taking care of her." I say, squinting my eyebrows at him and his ridiculous words.

"I am going to better, ok!" He yells, trying really hard to prove it.

"You need help." I say, raising my eyebrows.