Imagine!

It is a scorching hot summer day in Newton, Alabama. No birds sing to the rising sun; no crickets chirp to announce their presence. My brother, my sister, and I sit inside our air-conditioned home, waiting for the heat to subside. Seconds tick away, then minutes, and then hours. Our boredom finally outweighs our need to be cool, and we quickly decide on a plan of action. Because a yard is such a boring place, we must imagine it to be as exciting as humanly possible. Sally Ride, an American astronaut, once said, "All adventures, especially into new territory, are scary." I am a firm believer that the world that goes unseen by mortal eyes is often the most dangerous.

Our first order of business is to tend to the creatures in the field beside our house. Dressed in mismatched articles of outlandish clothing and sporting such items as a soccer ball, a plastic chain, and an oversized twig as weapons, we make our way out the back door and past a mountain of abandoned truck tires. As I cross the threshold from this world and into a new reality, everything seems to take on a new life. The trees whisper a welcome and the grass beckons us to move closer. What once was worn bicycle pads, becomes indestructible armor; our weapons begin to pulse with enchanted energy. As guardians over this territory, we begin to patrol the regions under our protection. Suddenly, a sound erupts from the evil land beyond our borders. Preparing for an imminent invasion, we form an outward-facing circle. My brother stands to my left, facing the land of the large-eyed beasts. My sister turns to the right, facing the passageway of the metallic monsters. Fearfully, I move to face the unknown land, which is filled with beings so dark and evil that their very souls are like black holes, from which there is no escape. We wait anxiously for the aggressors to show themselves. Losing my patience, I hurl my enchanted ball into the overgrowth before me. There is a shout, and then my weapon returns. Realizing that they have been discovered, two soldiers of the abyss rise from their hiding place and begin marching toward us at an alarming pace. Their towering, seven-foot, black armored figures cause the trees to tremble and the grass to die, but we are ready to defend the land of light at all costs. They draw their swords in unison, never slowing their enormous stride. Unable to wait any longer, we rush toward them. In a flurry of clinking metal, the battle only lasts a few minutes. After winning the skirmish and driving the evil back behind its borders, we collapse in a sweating pile of dirty, smiling warriors. After all, there is nothing more satisfying than saving an entire community of magical creatures.

After our impressive display of skills in the field, we journey from the backyard into our neighbor's fiendishly quiet front yard. This realm offers many herbs that could prove useful in battle. Upon obtaining the all-purpose plants from various cultivated beds, we begin to make our leave. We are halted, however, by a small giggling that seems to come from all directions. The yard itself is devoid of life, but upon further inspection, we find a large storm drain running underneath the driveway. I bend down to inspect the concrete orifice. The dusty, cobweb-covered roof and the waste-littered floor exude an odor of decay. Feeling suddenly drained of all happiness, I rise and turn to leave. A sudden and painful jerk on my hair makes me stop. I turn on my heel, ready to reprimand my sister, only to find her staring at me with wide, disbelieving eyes. Cautiously, I reach behind my head. My hand brushes something leathery and rough. I grab the nearest appendage and bring the transgressor around to eye level. My index finger and thumb are pinching an eight-inch purple tail, attached to a five-inch purple minion. He smiles mischievously, brandishing his dangerously sharp teeth. Then, he snaps up to bite my finger, causing me to drop him. Knowing that he is on his way to retrieve backup, I order our rag-tag team to retreat from the populated yard. The sun reaches its climax and we have only one destination left.

Beyond the neighbor's house lies a small grassy clearing where two old oak trees stand defiantly in the sand. We covet the trees mostly for their relaxing shade. We rest awhile, caressed by their loving branches. After a brief reprieve, we feel that we are ready for anything. As if on cue, the ground begins to shake. We leap from the protection of our ancient friends, feeling more at ease with dirt beneath our feet. Weapons at the ready, we struggle to remain upright as the ground rolls like the ocean in a tempest. Then, all is quiet, just like the calm before a storm. Suddenly, we are thrown from our feet as the ground becomes an erupting volcano of black flesh. We gather ourselves in time to see innumerable insectoid eyes emerge from the ground, watching us like a vulture watches its prey. Eight hairy, black legs rise from the dust and find footholds in the many crevices of those trees which we call our own. Angered, we begin to attack with all our combined might, but the armor of this mutant arachnid seems unbreakable. Finally, my brother has an idea. He pulls the herbs we collected earlier out of his pocket. Understanding his meaning, we pull out the rest of our gathered plants. Grinning smugly at our own ingenuity, we combine our herbs and light the bundle on fire. The spider seems to recoil a bit, but before it can escape, I hurl the flaming torch of weeds at its soft underbelly. A sickening scream echoes through the air as the monster falls back into the pit from whence it came. We give a few joyful shouts and pat the gathering dust off each other's armor. Our smiles span from ear to ear as we joyously retake the oak trees.

At the end of the day, when the battles are won, Mother calls to us from behind the rusty screen door. The magic and the mystery slowly melt away as we return to the cool, air-conditioned house. We didn't take a shuttle into space and discover new worlds, but we had the most exciting adventure a kid would ever need. The greatest part was never really having to leave the safety of the back yard.