You are my fate

Your nose gives me butterflies Gru

Gorou's pov

People always say to keep childhood friends close. That they will always stay with you. Well it was true for me.

Kokomi and I had been the closest frineds for many years now. I remember when I first saw her, she was so beautiful. She was the brightest fish in the pond we met. Her fish eyes trapped me and I didn't mind at all. We would do everything together. We used to sneak out and spend the whole day out playing. Until her father found out tho hahaha. We still did it of course but it was less frequent.

Man I remember when I was still training. She would send little fishes to give me inspirational words like "you can make it! When you're done, let's meet in our favorite spot, my scales are excited to see you" (imagine scales going crazy idk) It would alwast make my tail do zigzags.

Some years later, in our first war, she would always give me a "good luck" kiss. She often would say that being with me gave her a sense of freedom. Although when we had arguments, she would hiss at me but I loved her so I hissed back.

A couple of days ago, she mentioned having kids. It was wierd that she asked that since freedom was her thing. Being held back by kids was not something she would enjoy. I told her that I didn't have any opinions on it and that I wanted to keep things how they are. After all, I've never been a fan of children. They are smelly and pull on my tail. I eat children.

She insisted that there was no meaning behind that question, but it was a lie. I found out today that she was indeed pregnant. I was mad, why did she lie and why didn't she tell me sooner about it. But as her husband, I needed to be supportive. Things went well, kokomi was healthy so I wasn't too worried about it. The baby on the other hand came out terrifying.

It looked like a pill, and it was YELLOW. WHY IS A BABY YELLOW. I was expecting a goldfish or something BUT NOT THAT WTF. Anyway, the nurse was a bit startled and concerned that it look nothing like me. Can't blame her though. "He's b-beautiful" said kokomi with tears in her eyes. "No tf it's not" I said . She completely ignored me.

The nurse kicked me out and sent me to the waiting room. There was someone else waiting in there. After a small talk, I found out that he was waiting to do a DNA test. Well not for him, it was actually for his minion???. It turns out one of them ran away and had a "adventure" with someone and might have gotten her pregnant. "What a coincidence, my wife just gave birth hahaha" I said. "Is it yellow?" He said "...yeah it is" I said connecting all the dots. "I'm afraid that's probably not your child" he said.

The nurse came back and told me that I could get in the room now. I walked in silently. I cant believe it... she cheated on me with a banana looking ass thing.
"How should we name him?" Kokomi said with a bright smile with some sweat drops in her forhead. "How about Phil, that's the name of the minion you cheated on  me with isn't? " I said. "How  did you find out.." She said. "How could you, I loved you and you betray me like this" a hint of sadness could be noted in my voice. "I'm sorry, it all happened so fast... I... you were out of home and I felt lonely" she said crying now. "WITH A MINION are your standards that low? " I said "He seduced me with sweet words... I wasn't myself that day" she said as she sniffed her tears. "Sweet words?? How to eat a banana?? You call that sweet words" I said "you know it has always been my dream to be a banana and even more to be eaten like one" she said (damn she got some interesting fantasies). "We're over goodbye kokomi... I thought you were better than this " I said leaving the room. "Gorou please don't leave... You are my only dog pls" I shut the door and noticed the guy was no longer there.

Whatever, I'm going to look for a place to stay. Maybe thoma could let me stay in the teahouse for a bit. I can fit in the dog house.

That's it for now byebye dandruff flakes

Now I get to write random stuff so the fanfic looks longer than it actually is LMAO. Imagine going to your kitchen and finding out a minion there. Peeling a banana while staring at you. Then the minion (let's call him Zuckerberg) falls to the floor and drags himself to your feet. Zuckerberg later on starts licking your toes and slowly gets up to your knees. You kick him and he goes flying out of your window. Gets trapped in a firework and explodes BOOM. you go to your room and there is another minion playing the guitar so you lay down next to him ( let's call this one Jefferson) Jefferson then smacks your head with the guitar and you die. The end