To the Stars and Beyond

Chapter 4

Boswell claps his hands together in delight, "Ah! So you already know each other. How perfect!"

There goes my plan to separate my emotions from trapeze.

Davis is standing in front of me wearing black shorts and t-shirt, his golden hair sweaty and ruffled. He's looking at me like I must be looking at him: happy, surprised, scared, and unsure, all at once.

"I didn't know you did trapeze." I remark.

He doesn't take his eyes off me for one second, "I could say the same to you."

Nervously, I look over at Boswell who is grinning like it's the 1600s and he just discovered gravity.

"Um, should we get started then?" I ask, hoping to break them both out of their strange trances.

Boswell jumps, "Of course! I figured today we would just start off with some basic catches to help you gain some trust towards each other."

Davis and I both nod and so the trainer sends us climbing up opposite platforms. When I get to the top, I unhook my trapeze bar and hold it in both my hands like I have a million times. For a second, I forget that Liv is gone. But then I look up and meet eyes with a tall blond boy. It immediately feels wrong to be up here without her.

"Let's start off with a straddle whip catch!" Boswell says from the ground.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Davis swing from his platform and begin getting ready to catch me. I can't take my eyes off the ground. The height never used to bother me, but now I keep picturing myself falling just like Liv.

"Any time now, ma chérie!" Boswell reminds me.

I attempt to shake the feeling in the back of my mind and turn to my bar. Fitting Davis's timing, I leap from the platform and feel my body swing forward. I fold myself over and split my legs out. When my bar reaches Davis's, I let go and extend my arms for the catch.

Before I can stop myself, my eyes lock on the ground and I start feeling nauseous. Just as my hands are about to meet my partner's, I panic and fold myself into a tight ball. My back hits the net and I close my eyes, allowing my breathing to return to a normal speed.

"Bien ma chérie, what happened?" Boswell wonders in bewilderment, "That was a trick for beginners!"

I can feel myself getting flustered as I try to think of an excuse. But I find that I don't even know what happened.

"Can I go to the washroom?" I pant.

Without waiting for a response, I dash from the gym. As I'm walking the familiar maze of halls, I find myself stopping in front of Eleanor's office. Through the window into her small organized office, I can see a picture of Liv and I pinned to the bulletin board. We're wearing our yellow sequined trapeze costume from our last couple shows.

I remember taking that picture. We had been sitting with a few other cast members before the start of the show, laughing and talking nonsense. There had been a camera crew taking pictures of our acts for publicity on the circus's tour. One of them had seen Liv and I and asked to take a picture of us in our matching costumes.

It all seems like so long ago now.

Pushing the door open slowly, I step into the office. Eleanor doesn't appear to be there so I allow myself to take a closer look at the picture. I realize that it is actually a cut out of a newspaper dated around the same time as Liv's accident. Below the picture, the journalist had wrote:

It is with great sadness that the acrobatic community announces the passing of Oliva Parker (On the right), trapeze partner of Malya Winston (On the left), Cast member of Magie de Minuit, and daughter of world renown trapezist Isla Parker. Her death was a traumatizing experience for everyone in the audience of Magie de Minuit's show in Paris, who had to watch her fall many feet due to a missed catch. The real question we all have though is: will Miss Winston return to the show after Magie de Minuit's break? And if she does, how much will her performance lack without Miss Parker's charm and grace? Will Magie de Minuit finally decide to choose the less flashy and dangerous route and add a safety net to aerial acts? We all know that Miss Parker was the star of the duet. With her gone, will Miss Winston be able to step up into those shoes? Our many questions shall be answered soon enough.

In loving memory of Olivia Parker (2001-2018)

The thing about human beings is that they don't actually care about the well being of artists, acrobats, actors, and singers.

They just want a story.

And I will give them a good one. I will not fail in front of them and fulfill their expectations that I am nothing without Liv. She always used to tell me I was too stubborn for my own good. But maybe this time it is for my own good. I will do this for Liv.

I turn and leave the office, heading back into the aerial gym. Davis is sitting on the floor tapping his hands while Boswell is speaking to someone on the phone- no doubt about the pathetic girl he got stuck training. They both look up when I clear my throat, "Alright, let's try this again?"

Boswell quickly dismisses the person on the other end of the line and stuffs his phone in his pocket, "Parfait!"

This time, we make the catch perfectly.

"Now we move on!" Boswell announces.

                                                                                           ஃ

By the end of the training session, Boswell is practically dancing around the gym in excitement. After I finally found my mindset, Davis and I excelled at every trick and catch Boswell threw our way. It was as if we'd been training our whole lives together.

While Davis and I are unwrapping our hands and ankles, Boswell says, "So there are four more days for us to choreograph an act before we have to leave for Rome on the tour. Do either of you have experience with aerial rope?"

Davis nods at the same time that I shake my head.

Boswell claps his hands together, "Parfait! Tomorrow morning, meet here at 8am and he will teach you the basics, ma chérie. I will join you at 10 to start choreo."

Before either of us can say a word, the old man is gone. I finish unwrapping the tape around my thumb and then stand up to leave.

"Mal, what do you think about getting coffee tomorrow morning before training?" Davis asks me.

"I don't drink coffee." I tell him.

That's a lie. I probably consume more coffee than any other human being on this planet.

He puts a hand on the back of his neck, "Oh. Well, you don't have to get coffee. You could always get a smoothie or something."

I fight to hide my smile. He's actually nervous about asking me out. If he wasn't my trapeze partner, I would have said yes to this boy in a heartbeat.

"Thanks but I think I'm good."

To his credit, his charming manor doesn't falter, "Have you been to Rome before?"

I shake my head, "I've only ever travelled with the circus and they've never performed there before."

"Well then," he smirks, "You, me, rent a boat, visit the islands. How does that sound?"

I bite my lip. While the thought of Davis and I spending that much time together makes my heart skip a beat, I know I shouldn't. "Sorry Davis but I just want to focus on my act."

"Well we're gonna be there an extra day while the circus packs up, so there'll be plenty of time after the show."

What does he not understand? Some boys are awful at taking hints.

"Davis, I don't want to hang out with you."

There. Straight, hard facts.

He crosses his arms, "Did I do something?"

"Good night Davis, I'll see you tomorrow morning." I say, turning and leaving before he can stop me.