Cruel summer

"Christine" The gruff voice broke the silence you had been stuck in for hours, it was not the first time you felt this ravaged, while you looked through the window at the black landscape, at the dead land before you, beyond the borders of the property you called home. You knew it was a forgotten cemetery, the soil covering all the corpses of the individuals of that city, the city whose name, streets, buildings or inhabitants you could not recall, and although he would say you were lucky to be alive, you knew quite well you belonged to them, to the citizens buried under the soil, under the dust, under oblivion. "I've told you not to aimlessly walk around the place, it's dangerous".

It was true, the damages in the place were as hideous as lacerated was your mind, and that was one of the reasons you would never think of leaving, it was not like you had more options either, but the fact that the cold colours that flooded the furniture and tapestries mimicked the colour of your heart, slowly freezing, dying, and everything was as blue as your feelings were, would make you stay if you had had another option. 

You nodded and headed to your chair, where you took a seat and waited for his voice to talk to you, to command you. He plodded towards you with his hands intertwined on his back, next he sat before you and examined you, your face, your eyes, your body. It was always like that, as if he was trying to find an error, a defect, and he was always able to find it because an exasperated sigh followed all the times, as well as an annoyed look. 

"Any plans for today?" You shook your head and looked at the floor. "You can't remember anything?"

Same answer. 

"Alright, I guess you're staying here by my side today".

You didn't emit any comment because there was no need, you knew it quite well. He would always ask the same question, but you were not able to remember. Not a thing, not what you had been before this. All you knew, the man before you was your husband, to whom you had to be devoted to because he had also happened to save your life, regardless the fact you didn't know what from, his face was familiar though, your memories were gone but you were certain you had been by his side for a long time now.

"Oh, sweetheart" His eyes met yours, he was almost kneeling before you and you knew what was going to happen next, his devilish grin stood out in his face. "Do you really want to stay by my side?"

His words were charming but his voice had never sounded like it, in fact, displeasure was always there, not even hiding but in plain sight. 

"Yes, Stephen". 

You assured because you had nothing else left, it was just the two of you in the world, because he was your husband and you were his wife, because you could not help but love him although despair was probably the only reason why you loved him, you needed something (or someone) to clung onto.

"I love it when you're this submissive" his face remained somber as did his voice. You didn't know much after what had happened but to you, that was what hatred would look like, even if he was trying to disguise it somehow and pretend it was love or lust. "You always want to please your beloved husband, don't you?"

You did not know how to react, he was your husband but still a stranger you knew nothing about and yet,  you didn't want to reject him because when you were lying together, that was the only time you could feel something different, as though he realised you were actually the woman he had chosen to marry, to spend eternity with. Even if his fingers gave you the shivers due to the colour they embraced, as if they had touched the depths of his soul, you would not reject their touch; no matter how much icy they were, they would always make you melt.

Stephen was playing with your hair, taking some strands of it and smelling them. You had obliged to lay on his bare chest after your little physical encounter, because you knew it was what he liked, you had got to know a bit of him throughout your aftermath while you were trying to get your old self back.