HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT

you broke me

chapter 1

far down below the sound of the waterfall and right behind me chirping of birds making me ponder my thoughts and wonder how did I get here how did I make this mess of my life. tears ran down my eyes and I couldnt hold them any longer. Each tear cold on my cheek reminded me of heartache, betrayal, and regrets. I am in this abyss and have no way to get out. how do I come out of it? after running for the last 3 hours my legs started trembling and I fell to my knees.

I started weeping, like a child .sobbing and howling, like a wounded animal struggling for life. I cried for myself, I cried for my mother, I cried for HIM. I cried and cried and cried until my throat became soar until not a single tear was left in my eyes and until my mind became numb. I cried seeping through light embracing the darkness I cried and then there was nothing but his voice..

I see you Muskaan.. even when I close my eyes I see you but then why wont you talk to me. Why wont you look at me? cant you see you are hurting me? Cant you see the heart-wrenching pain I am going through? it hurts. it hurts so bad I feel like dying. I love you Muskaan. I will never leave you. you know that right. your smile is my favorite but your socks collection tops . you are infuriating. even now you are dismissing my question with your sweet words.

Muskaan my sweet sweet Muskaan.. you know your name makes me laugh you dont have your front tooth and youre always hiding your smile yet your name is Muskaan ha hey dont be mad at me . you know your parents are to blame Muskaan who cant even smile you stupid boy my nana told me it will grow dont make fun of me or else Ill break all your teeth all of em but he didnt stop he kept laughing. And although it annoys me when he makes fun of me but his 8 years old cocky smile and his hearty laugh always make me smile.