The Guide To Becoming a Chameleon

11. Hillary Made Waffles

I lean back at my chair and crack my fingers, stretching them up my head. My Psychology paper is done, now I just need to finish my Global Politics paper and finish the Health presentation. I heard mom and dad's bedroom door close around half an hour ago. I turn in my chair and look at my bed, my eyes naturally falling on the cassette tape lying ever so carelessly beside a pile of books. It's almost like it knows that it's ruining me, and it's ever so smug about it.
Stupid cassette tape. Who even uses cassette tapes?

"Go away." I say, as if it will magically just slide off the bed and disappear. The tape and I have a staring match for the longest time, until I give in.

"Fine." I say and grab it off the bed.

There's just one light bulb in the attic. I turn it on, making the slight dust in the air visible. It's been months since I've been here, or anyone has for that matter. It smells like wood, a lot of it. The only things here are dad's huge tool box, a broken keyboard from mom's old computer and two metal trunks, one empty and the other one filled with useless old stuff and torn mattresses, both of them looking like a 'free hugs' stall for not-so-free tetanus shots.

I grimace as I step on a spider web by mistake, a shiver running through my spine. Well, the spider doesn't have a home to come to anymore.

The windows in the attic are dusty too, looking like billions of raindrops fell on them and stayed there until they dried. Nobody seems to have opened them since a very long time. I open them, revealing a more colourful, cold and vivid night and breathe in. It smells like grass and nature, bringing me back to the night I sneaked out with Jake.

I grab a big brush dad kept in the second trunk and clean most of the floor. I carefully dig into the trunk again, looking for the cassette player and finally find it under a broken lamp, but without the lampshade. Grabbing it, I sit down near the window, feeling the cold air bite my cheeks.

I plug my headphones to it and after around five minutes, figure out how to use the cassette tape. I slowly put on my headphones and hold my breath, my heart racing wildly under my chest. It's just white noise at first, but then a woman speaks, her voice soft and graceful.

"Hello Kiara."

I pause it, feeling a huge blow in my chest, the wind knocked completely out of me. This is her. I know it because I've heard her. She's my mother. And she's dead. A big knot restricts my throat. I swallow it and take in deep breaths. Unpause.

"You are probably wondering why you are listening to me. Why today? Why in an old-fashioned cassette?" She says ever so softly and I clutch my stomach, needing something to hold on to.

Tell me. Please.

"Well, to answer your second question, I wanted you to listen to my voice. Remember it. Know it. Because I am your mother." I hear her smile "And a mother is forever." She softly laughs, a beautiful sound that reminds me of a babbling brook, making me automatically smile too. "Also, because I had two of these tapes laying around. The perfect number for you and Drew."

Pause.
I blink, then frown. Drew?

Of course. I had a brother but-

Everything forms in my brain like flashes. The crying boy. His birthmark. His face looking familiar in intersection class. Me and Jake talking about him in the restaurant.

That's way too big a coincidence. Yanking off my earphones, I take out my phone from my pocket and click on Jake's name on speed dial. The line rings once...twice...thrice...four times and then I hear a crackle and Jake's sleepy voice.

"I know that things between us are patched up but this better be fucking important." He says, tiredness radiating off his voice like the cold.

"J-jake?" I stutter. I try to form coherent words, but they just won't come out. I start shivering uncontrollably, something in my throat feeling like it's jumping up and down. Small, pathetic sounds come out of my mouth and I clamp it with my hand, hoping it would stop.