Standing By

Dear diary,

She looks so weak in that hospital bed, she arrieved to the hospital four weeks ago. She looks so thin and I don't know how's gonna be when she wakes up, when she finds out that her parents are dead. Where would she gonna be?

My mom asked me if I could be able to visit her, cause she is a John Doe, no one knows her, and my mom wants me to check on her, if she's ok, or if she's not dead, my mom doesn't like when I say that so I just started telling 'ok' instead of 'dead'. She's always sleeping, well I don't blame her, it was a hell of an accident.

Four weeks ago I started doing this routine. I wake up, I have breakfast, I go check on her, when my mother's turn ends and we go home together for lunch, and then, sometimes, I spend all afternoon with her. I talk with her, I sound like a crazy person cause it looks like I'm talking alone, but I believe she can hear me. Other times I bring a book, even though I hate to read, but it's for her so...whatever I just do it. She might not hear me but I don't care, I don't do this only for her, I do it for me. Everyone thinks I'm so selfish, and I'm trying to change it, maybe she is my therapy.

In the beginning I didn't wanted to do this, I admit it. I didn't know her, I didn't care for her, she was just another John Doe, I didn't wanted to waste my time with a John Doe, she was in a coma, it sounded like wasting my precious time. But when I walked into the room for the first time, this sounds crazy but I fell in love with her in a question of seconds. Her hair is brown, not a dark brown, or a brown with some tresses blonde. No! She has a perfect tone of brown. Brown isn't even a beautiful colour but in her, it just looks amazing, and I love brunettes.

I went closer with my mom behind me, and I grabbed her hand sorrounded by strings. I don't know how, she was in coma, but she grabbed my hand back. And then I made my decision, I'll not waste my time, I'll help her finding hers. Away from the past, no worries about the future, just living the present hoping she wakes up.

I imagine her eyes blue like the sky, brown like a hazelnut or green like leafs in Spring.

I imagine the sweetest and the kindest girl in the world.

I'll try to make her happy no matter what, with, or without me. Because I promised I would take care of her, when she needs me, I'll be there. I'll always be there for her.

'I will wait for you, and when you wake up I'll be here for you, and then...I will look after you.' - I whispered, holding her hand next to my chest.