The Speech

Chapter 19

Dylan's POV

My developing friendship with Jackie seems to be improving since our study session. We now even regularly walk to 3rd period together because our classes are across the hall from each other.

"Are you on Avery duty tonight?" I ask, as I follow her to our next classes.
"No, Theo and I have a project to work on." She tells me and we stop just outside the classroom. I catch a glimpse of May with a guy inside the room. She's laughing as she holds onto his jacket, and I can feel the pit in my stomach growing.
"How long is that gonna take?" I ask Jackie. She shrugs.
"I don't know Dylan, but I'm not gonna rush it for you." She says with a stern voice and I let out a chuckle. I lean close to her ear, my lips almost touching her cheek.
"I would never rush you..." I say in a hushed tone and watch as goosebumps spread on her neck. I pull back and start to walk away.
"Just let me know when y'all are done." I tell her, and don't wait around for a response.

Who was May even with? The thought creeps into my mind. I try to clear it out, not give it the time of day, but I can't help it. She's moving on, she doesn't care about you. This one thought stops me in my tracks. I start replaying our breakup in my head, and our argument at the steakhouse. I remember standing in the bathroom stall with her, watching as she set up a line of coke for each of us. I remember the wild smile on her face when my head rose from the line. And then she tried to walk me through how I would feel, and when it ended, but all I could focus on was her lips. And I tried to kiss her, but she turned away and said
"Please don't tell me this was just a ruse to seem okay with me doing coke?"
"What? No, I just... I love you May. I dont want this to be over." I tell her.
"Dylan, we are over. There's too much history between us that we're not ever going to forget." She reminds me.
"This isn't about the history May, it's about what's happening right now. It's about you just suddenly doing coke and how you couldn't just have a conversation with me about it!" I explain to her, but she has left the stall already.
"Dylan let me be clear. We are done. I am sick of the way you make me feel, the way you constantly worry, I'm sick of you Dylan. And I'm sick of us so stop fighting for it." After that, she stops at the mirror to check her reflection, and walks out the door.

     Screw her, I don't need her. She can ignore me, and hate me and do whatever else she wants. It doesn't matter, none of it does.
Fuck it, where is Pez.

Theo's POV

      Distancing myself from Avery without her thinking I'm ignoring her should be considered rocket science. It mainly involves a lot of texting her. If she's at least texting me and having conversations, she doesn't really notice that she hasn't seen me face to face much. This isn't the first time I've tried to distance myself from her, I've tried to before, but every time I ended up going back to her. Typically I would end up cracking because she'd call me, or text me saying "I need you." And those three little words would drag me back in. It was usually some mundane, unimportant, could ask anyone to help her with things, but I couldn't help but come running.

     This time will be different though. This time I'm staying away, and keeping busy. I'll text her, and try to keep it casual, but I've gotta be away from her for a while. And my first distraction is working on a history project with Jackie. Who is already standing by my car waiting for me when I walk into the parking lot.
"Eager for homework? Really?" I joke and she rolls her eyes.
"Moreso just eager to get out of here." She responds right before her phone rings.
"It's Avery." She states before answering it.
"What's up?" I hear her say while I throw my backpack in the backseat of my car.
"Yeah I'm with him right now. Were you needing a ride or something?" She says and I immediately run to the front of the car frantically shaking my head no. She backs away a little, freaked out by my response.
"Well actually we've already left. We have to go out to a museum for research." She lies and I silently thank her. We both get in the car and I pull out as quickly as I can, hoping Avery's nowhere near so she won't see us.
"Okay, sorry hon. Bye." She says and hangs up the phone.