If only I knew...

cold shoulder

He didn't even apologise that night, he just moved on and changed the topic

That night we said good night to eachother and went to sleep

New year
Ryan: "Happy New Year" 5:54 am
Me: "happy new year" 4:37 pm

I saw his message when he sent it but I decided to make him wait for me just like I waited for him for years

We didn't exchange a single message from that day, two months later...

February 13, 2022

Ryan: "hey, your new video is bomb"
I am also a youtuber along with my sister

February 15, 2022

Ryan: "can I call you in an hour?" 11:44 pm
Me: "today?"
Ryan: "yea"

I said ok because I had a holiday next day but in reality I wanted to talk to him, I missed him

February 16, 2022
Ryan: "are you asleep?" 12:25 am
Me: "no" 12:34 am
Ryan: "I'll call you tomorrow, I'm going to sleep now, good night" 1:41 am
Me: ok, I was already sleeping anyways 12:15 pm

I wasn't sleeping, I was so angry and upset that I did reply him although I saw his message, flashbacks of me waiting for him on new year stroke me and I pretended that I was already asleep

Now it was my turn to give him a cold shoulder, I wanted to see him struggling to get me back, I knew my worth and I for sure wasn't worth the behaviour I was getting

Ryan: "oh so good" 12:16 pm
Me: "obviously"
Ryan: him being the narcissistic he is "you couldn't wait for me so you fell asleep"
Me: "no I just wanted to sleep"
Ryan: "got it"

I couldn't deal with him anymore, I snapped and completely changed my behaviour towards him

Me: "oh yea and about you wanting to call me today, I don't think this will work out"
Ryan: "why?"
Me: "I have school tomorrow, I need to sleep, we could talk only during the day"
Ryan: "no I can't, I have classes"
Me: "too bad"
Ryan: "I don't care I'll call you now"
Me: "my phone is about to die"
Ryan: "I was joking..."

It made me very happy how he wanted to talk to me so badly

If only I knew that this isn't going to last even a day...

If only I knew...