Chasing my Happiness

PROLOGUE

"I miss, them." napabuntong-hininga ako dahil sa pagod. I look at the clock and it's 3 pm, and I'm expecting a new patient.

While waiting i close my eyes and i feel so exhausted. Pumikit ako nang panandalian at hinilot ng bahagya ang ilong dahil sa ilang araw kong dinadama ang sipon. Tumingin lang ako sa pintuan ng shelter ko nang may kumatok at nakita ko sa glass door and isang Bodyguard nila Saige.

Tumayo ako para salubungin siya. I know she's up on something... again.

"Good afternoon, Doc. Pinapadeliver po ni Ma'am Rov." Umarko ang kilay ko sa pinadala ni Saige. Tumayo ako para kunin itong bouquet at ilang letters.

"Salamat po." Ngumiti ako sa pinagkakatiwalaan nilang Bodyguard.

Seeing this Paper Tulips flower, makes reminiscing my past. She also put some of polariod pictures and invitation.

Tulips.. he used to gave me. I get used to with our picture that's memorable.

Mga imahing hindi ko na ulit makita na maiipinta pa.

It's been a lots of years since then, but he's hunting me. He's fuckin' happy with his new life and his wife!

Thinking about it is not healthy.

Mas lalo lang akong nairita!

Tumawag ako agad kay Saige dahil sa pagkaramdam na inis. I know that she knows how i hate reminding things of him, she's off limits!

"Hi cousin!" she happily greeted. I can now imagine her face full of pleasantry.

"Don't call me Cousin! You bitch!" I spatted. I'm annoyed alright.

"Ganyan kana ba ngayon? Parang ilang buwan lang tayong hindi nag sama! Bakit natanggap mo na ba?" and now she's acting like it's my fault! She's guilt tripping me!

I did not say anything. I heard her sighed.

"Do you like it, couz? Hehe." She laugh without humor. Hindi ako natutuwa. Kung pwede lang talaga masampal siya agad.

"Remembering him, eh?" She added. I heard her annoying laugh again! Siguro'y hindi na maipinta pa ang mukha ko sa inis.

"Happy? And to answer your question I don't! Hindi ko nagustuhan!"

Tumawa siya ng malakas kaya pinatayan ko siya ng telepono. She's always annoying! Ever since we're in Elementary to College!

Napa-upo ako sa upuan ko at napahapo ng noo. Another stress. Tinignan ko 'yong pinadala niya bago kinuha 'yong Invitation. Meron dong picture namin ni Saige noong kabataan at kinuha ko 'yon before ko itapon 'yong paper flowers. That's gross.

It's her weeding invitation. Finally she's getting what she deserved. But me? Kasal na ako sa trabaho ko. I love animals, and i will always love it. Specially sa mga Pusa.

Natapos ang hapon at sinarado ko na rin ang Sarili kong Clinic. Isa ito sa pinagmamalaki ko. Sumakay ako ng kotse ko at pumunta ng Sementeryo, para bisitahin sila.

After i saw their names i sighed heavily.

I miss you both. I know you might not be here, existing and living with us but i know in our hearts you never died. You always have been in our minds. Your wisdom words tattooed. A tightly hugs. Nice advises. Everything you did we're still remaining. The memory, is still here.

I've grown up, fine women. Not seeking anything, just happiness and safety.

I look at beside's his name. Ahh i really miss them.

"My baby... How are you, my poor little baby?" I whispered as my tears can't stop pouring.

I smiled sadly, still not getting off the memories we had. Never thought you both, all, could leave me like this. But, i know. In this world there's no permanent. Only memories and the ghost of us. It was never been replaced, but they intend to leave.