Amber Ball
February 14, 2013
Kelly Keough
The Beauty of Hurt
“Everyone is going to hurt you, you just have to find the ones worth suffering for”, Bob Marley once stated. For some people, life consists of constant feelings of pain and struggling. Yet, other people live a life that consists mainly of joy, success, and money. But, no matter where you came from, everyone will experience pain one way or another. Pain is inevitable. Life is pain. Life is hard, and a constant struggle. Many people choose to wallow in their pain. They let the pain consume their life and become pessimistic. I am appreciative of all the struggles my life has thrown at me because it has made me into the person I am today.
I was born September 28, 1993 in Grand Fork, North Dakota and resided there for five years. I was a social butterfly. I remember feeling obligated to assist others and listen to their problems. I always wanted to “fix people” as my mother would call it. She always told me I didn’t need to carry people’s baggage with me. Yet, I couldn’t help but feel this uncontrollable yearning to help people. I had this naive and innocent nature that would later, in return, cause me heartbreak.
If I had to choose one stage of my life that was the most painful, I would choose my late middle school years. Yet, I am the most appreciative of that time in my life because it gave me the strength I have acquired today. The transition from child to adult can be extremely stressful. Being a teenager isn’t easy for a majority of people. Feelings of awkwardness and insecurity are constant leeches in a teenager’s mind. In addition to the typical hormonal nuisances, I had to deal with bullies throughout much of 7th and 8th grade. This kind of drama deeply affected me. It caused me to be afraid of people and to categorize people; thinking they’re all the same. I never gave relationships with new people a chance. I casted everyone off as selfish, judgmental, stuck-up, or impudent. Not to mention, the few who didn’t appear threatening scared me the most because I believed their good intentions to be too good to be true.I would sabotage the relationship before I got too close. Fear had consumed my life like a plague destroying hundreds of lives simultaneously. Needless to say,this was the lowest point in my life.
Furthermore, I was convinced that investing my heart into any kind of relationship resulted in one thing: Pain. I stopped socializing because I was afraid of saying “the wrong thing”. That is when I gave up the idea of being accepted or “popular”. At the end of the day, I just didn’t care anymore. Luckily, I came out of a high school with my positive attitude still intact. I’m a fighter. I fought my way towards happiness. I choose happiness, and request to feel it. I have open arms to the positive possibilities. Resilience is something I’d like to believe I carry much of.
Truth be told, Life is hard. It’s difficult. It can be a constant struggle. The world is harsh, and cold. Everybody seems to only be preoccupied with their own desires. In spite of all the darkness, I still choose to see the light because it is pointless to spend your days in a dark, cold room when you can live in a place that is beautiful and bright. I believe everybody has that power within. Everybody has the strength to remain optimistic in a world that is anything but rainbows and unicorns. So far, that is what life has taught me. It has taught me not to let the cruelty of the world morph you into a bitter person. Don’t let the world change you for the worse. Let the world change you for the better; learn from the pain.
