Truth - Lashton

Chapter 24

Luke's POV

I walked into the small, main room.

I saw 3 guys sitting at one small circular table, 4 girls sitting around another circular table and a giant, white, long table that held 8 people. Each circular table had a color around it and colored seats. There were other colored seats without a table on one side of the room and across from that was a giant TV.

"Hello, Luke!"

Mrs. Jones smiled and walked over to me, she was sitting in the back end of the room.

"Seeing as this is your first time with the other patients, I won't force you to sit with them. You can sit with me, okay?"

I nodded and followed her to the back end of the room.

I sat down in a blue seat, closest to the corner. I saw how most of the patients were looking at me. The circular table with the 4 girls were closest to me so I could hear them.

"He looks so young.."

"God, his arms.. You could see his veins.. What BMI do you think he is?"

"Probably BMI of 14 at most.. Jesus.."

"Guys, come on. He looks no older than 16 and has the tube. He's obviously been avoiding this room for this situation, so shut the fuck up and let the kid recover in peace."

One of the girls who was wearing a black sweater and a dark purple beanie snapped, still whispering. I did appreciate that but I didn't want them to know I was listening.

I looked at my food and sighed. They gave us a sweet treat, they apparently do this every Friday. This week was a brownie with sprinkles.

I slowly took a bite of the protein, breaded chicken steak was what I could identify.

It was nice but it made me scared, breading any food was useless and pointless to me. Only adds extra-

"Luke, are you okay?"

Mrs. Jones was a few seats next to me and I looked at her, smiled and nodded.

"Just.. thinking.."

"I know, dear but I promise it's all gonna be okay. No one is judging you, alright?"

I nodded and took another bite, trying to eat despite the overwhelming, life consuming guilt.

I picked at my food a bit, letting the thoughts run on their own.

I could still hear the girls talking, now whispered alot more quieter so I couldn't hear what they were saying. It was killing me, really.

Then I made the wrong choice, looking at my body. I couldn't do this, not while listening to how big or small I am in other's eyes.

I took my tray and left the room, going back to my own hospital room. I set my tray on my table before climbing into the bed and taking a few minutes to cry, wail and let everything out.

"Luke, dear?"

Mrs. Jones was there with a sad look on her face.

"I-I'm sorry! The-They were talking about me and I couldn't handle it!"

I sobbed out, my breathing cutting up my words.

"It's alright, Luke, you have nothing to apologize for. I'll get Mr. Irwin."

She left the room and I took the time to calm down. I was alone right now, I wouldn't be able to hear anyone talking about me. I'm safe here.

I wiped my face one last time and put the tray of food on my lap. That was when Mr. Irwin walked in with a worried look in his eyes.

"Hey, Luke. Mrs. Jones told me what happened and I'm so incredibly sorry about that. You don't have to sit out there anymore, okay?"

"It's okay.. Thank you.."

I mumbled out before taking a bite of my food.

"You seem calmer now, which is relieving. Mrs. Jones told me you weren't doing good."

I chuckled and looked at him as he sat down with this clipboard he was usually accompanied with when he had to stay while I ate.

"Yeah.. They were talking about my BMI or something.. It was something with my weight and it got too much for me.."

"I'm sorry again.. I'm glad you left as you did identify that as your trigger, correct?"

I just nodded to brush it off and took another bite, finding it alot more harder to eat while their words swarmed my head.

"This is getting easier.."

I looked at him and his face grew into a light, joyful smile. His dimples really showing through.

"That's wonderful to hear, Luke."

I smiled back and took my last bite.

I wish it was getting easier but it still hurts to eat, still hurts to look at my body, still hurts overall.

I'm becoming a liar to the person who trusts me and that hurt the most.